TAKE A BREAK FROM CELEBRATING THE HOLIDAYS. AND CELEBRATE YOU!
By Rick Green
This past year we’ve spoken to a lot of experts, and not had the time to put all of the videos up on the website. We are working on it, I promise. And we’re also putting together a set of six long videos about ADHD that will be available… Okay, we have ADHD, I’m not gonna set a date, but before the end of February. Oh dang, I set a date.
Anyway, as the year winds down we’d love to hear from you.
What about?
Well, normally ADHD and ADD people don’t acknowledge their successes. Or even feel them very deeply. I’ve written and produced 700 episodes of radio and television… and actually sat and watched maybe 50 of them. Why? I was too busy working on the next one. Never savouring the victory. Never, or rarely, celebrating the accomplishment.
(Damn, this was going to be a two sentence long introduction. I’m starting over.)
To cap off the year, take some time to think about, and actually acknowledge what you have accomplished this year, big or small, one thing or a thousand. What did you do this year that was a victory over the past, and over your ADHD? (Please, no modesty. There are over 21,000 registered members on this website eager to hear good news.)
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Ok, So i dont have ADD i have epstein barr cronic fatigue and take all these medications for ADD because they are supposed to wake u up when u dont have ADD. So question i was on riddalin 20mg xr which made me more tired it was too much went on vyvanse it worked for a while tried provigil worked for a while. this is an auto immune disease and i think that these meds stop to work after while because of that. i was on 20mg of adderall 2 times a day works great but my rx assistance wont cover it they say its not name brand stupid heads lol anyways so they gave me concerta 54mg once a day i am finding out it is really just riddalin. Is that true and is it gonna work for me? Anyone who can help i would love feedback.
So, late, as is still far too often, but here’s a list of my accomplishments & successes & other points of pride for 2011.
1. Grew this website dramatically. Affected thousands of ADDers directly and indirectly affecting the people in their lives.
2. The documentary ADD & Loving It?! went on PBS and was seen by millions of people.
3. Did a whole bunch of touring for PBS, at one point 11 flights in 9 days, and stayed healthy and sane and had fun. Met some really dedicated people. In an age where 90% of people working television are ashamed of the pandering programs they make, this was refreshing.
4. Invited to do live presentations and workshops across America and Canada, for ADHD groups, teachers, doctors, students and groups like the Tourette Foundation, which overlaps with ADHD/ADD a lot. Had great successes. Met some amazing, committed, dedicated people. Laughed a ton.
5. Staked out time and actually got a vacation with the kids! To Paris!
6. Took time off in the summer for the first time in many years. Had time with Ava.
7. Got a couple of other comedy projects moving forward that make me laugh.
8. Moved with only 2 weeks notice.
9. Avoided exercise classes.
10. Finished writing our book, ADD Stole My Car Keys, which my friend Bryce the animator illustrated. It’s on Amazon.com and it’s also an E-book. (Okay, Jimi and Ava did most of that stuff but I cheered them on.)
11. Started doing my artwork again.
12. Thinned and tossed and de-cluttered.
13. Worked with a ton of amazing people.
14. Had fun making videos, writing blogs and tweeting.
15. Helped friends who are going through a number of crisis.
16. Signed up for Linda Walker’s course on Productivity.
17. Did a couple of great personal development courses.
18. Got a new Mac! And an I-phone!
19. Backed up my hard drives!
20. Helped my kids to grow and flourish by biting my tongue.
21. Turned off the TV news and watched my stress levels drop.
22. Had more money in the bank at the end of the year than at the start of the year.
That’s awesome, Cornbreadwillie. It’s not like you arrive at a destination where you are done. Not like, “You can relax, we have removed your infected gallbladder. You’ll be good as new soon.” This is a muscle, or a set of muscles, you develop. And get better at. But never perfect. Even the best baseball player in the world misses six out of every ten pitches, right? That player can either mope and regret and mourn the six he missed and focus on what he did wrong. Or he can focus on the four he hit, and know that his salary is not based on the ones he misses, but the ones he hits. It’s about getting your batting average up. (Wow, I’m full of sports analogies today.)
Actually, this is a very interesting question William. I’m going to Blog about it on Thursday.
Depends if I have it managed or not.
Hey Ric, do you think of your ADD as a handicap or disability?
The entries here are just awesome! So inspiring! I’m sure they were inspiring to you as you were writing them. It really is amazing how listing what you’ve done changes your view of things. What I love about doing this, and I do it at the end of every day, is that I am confronted by how much I have accomplished. Even days that feel wasted, or that I got very little done, suddenly transform. I see how a dozen things got moved forward, and while lots remains to do, more calls, more stuff to review, another draft before it’s ready… I can see the progress.
Even my wife & partner Ava finds this a powerful exercise. She’ll be pooped and a bit fried, even down in the dumps after along day, and I’ll encourage her to list what she did. She remembers one or two things, then a few more, then looks at her email and realizes five more things got done, then notices paperwork that’s handled, forms sent, a video she gave editing notes on…
“Wow, that was quite a day.”
A few weeks back I did an awesome interview with Dr. Anthony Rostain. Over an hour of video. (Alas, a bit out of focus, so not sure if we can use it. The cameraman’s first time with that model of camera.)
Anyway, Dr. Rostain, or Tony, talked about the theory that ADHD people are ‘reward deficient. That we don’t feel the payoffs or enjoy our successes as much as most people. So we go after things with bigger rewards. In this case reward being something healthy or not healthy as the case may be.
So while it’s great to have people around you who acknowledge your successes, and it’s great when parents acknowledge their kids successes, or even take time to sit and learn about the online game their child plays all the time, it’s also important to reward ourselves.
As I mentioned, I have produced hundreds of hours of television and radio. But rarely paused to listen to it, celebrate it and enjoy the accomplishment. On New Years Day I’m going to list my accomplishments for this year.
Last year, very suddenly, I ended the habit of a lifetime. One day, I just decided, no more reading in the loo. Gone is the huge rack of magazines. Gone are the many volumes of “Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader” (including the one to which I contributed). No more sitting in there for half an hour, reading. I go in, do what I have to do, and go out.
This year, very suddenly, I ended another habit of a lifetime: spending every cent before I even got it. Once again, I just decided one day to start saving up for something big. I opened a TFSA, and as soon as I get my pay, I put a chunk of it right into the TFSA and I don’t touch it. I can’t believe I’ve saved up as much as I have—in less than a year!
OOPS! I meant @Sean BRAVO. Sorry Sean!
@Sean Beavo,
That is an amazing list of accomplishments!
I also hear the “She doesn’t think these are good enough.” And “Why aren’t you publishing these? They are amazing.” Oh, and I bet you have heard this one too:
“Why can’t you just take a compliment for what it is, instead of making excuses for why you don’t think you deserve it?”
I have been getting in to wildlife photography over the past few years as a hobby, and people are always amazed at the photos I take and that I should be selling them. They suggest that I should be a pro photographer (I am realistic enough to know that it wouldn’t pay unless I put a LOT of $$$$ into it.) But, the wonderful thing is getting noticed at my paying job for the photographs I take, including the ones right outside the office. Even the Vice President said they were great shots when he saw the ones I had at work in my cube walls.
Whenever I am asked how I even see or notice the animal or whatever I photographed, I tell them it is because of my ADHD. It is the ability to notice everything going on around me and the fact that I rarely leave home without my camera that I am able to capture the things I see.
When I went from my official Dx of ADHD, I had already read a few ADHD books, kneew it was genetic, and have multiple ADHDers in my family. I also had brought the doctor a LONG list of all the things about myself that I thought were due to ADHD, But I made sure that my positives outweighed the negatives, even if only by a little bit. I think I chattered nonstop about the things on that list non-stop the whole time I was in his office! It was a fairly easy diagnosis, because I knew what to bring. Info mom had given to me about my early grade school years helped fill in the blanks and her helping jog my memory about the middle school and high school difficulties helped.
I now had the official Diagnosis to go with the Dx from Mom (MSW). Adderall has helped, Adderall XR helped even more (I kept forgetting my afternoon dose) though I wonder if my brain is getting used to it, it’s been about 4 years on the same dose.
I wouldn’t be as successful at work without my Dx, and I wouldn’t have that job if it hadn’t been for being honest, open and positive about having ADHD. (HR would have canned me for 2 more tardies if I hadn’t spoken up and told them that Time Management is my biggest deficit in my ADHD, and they were willing to weigh that with all my positive contributions to the team and shaved a few of the tardies off. I am now salaried and as long as I don’t miss a morning meeting, I am good.
Thanks Rick! This topic really appeals to me. I’m a professional artist. I’m well known in my industry of face and body painting and have appeared on the cover of magazines, I’ve painted at the playboy mansion etc. So many times when I’m painting at an event…I’ll hear people say “…and he doesn’t even think he’s good.” I have a hard time recognizing or celebrating what I’ve accomplished. I still feel like everything I’ve done well, I haven’t really tried hard. If Santa is out there, I’d really like the ability to be more confident and to take a proper amount of pride in myself. As it stands I can write this list and instead of beaming with pride, think, yeah but I could have done better if. Grrrrr….All I want for Christmas is for that voice to go mute.
Anyhoo, enough blabbing…here’s what I did good this year!
I started the year in a depressive funk and can say that I’ve almost crawled my way out of it.
Despite my best efforts to be unsuccessful I have:
- Finalized my divorce!
- then…got married the most beautiful woman on the planet
- Some how made it through Immigration to the US and all that paperwork etc
- Mastered Adobe Illustrator
- Been hired on to teach at 4 major conventions in 2012
- Recorded 3 “how to face and body paint” DVD’s with a major company…I’ll be getting royalty checks every quarter
- Been published 6 times Three of which included a magazine cover
- Been an awesome dad to my kids and step kids
- Inspired many other artists to create some amazing works I’d never have come up with…yet they still seem to want to give me credit for
- Started Therapy for ADHD
- Started the process of building my confidence and ability to talk to people.
- Finished Christmas shopping before Christmas Eve….granted most of the presents I can afford to give this year are paintings on canvas I’ve made for friends and family.
- actively decided that paintings for friends and family is an AWESOME gift, not something I should feel humble or sorry about. (which I sorta do, but I keep chasing that guilt monkey in my brain away with a broomstick)
- Shared this website and some of Rick’s videos with 2000+ of my closest facebook friends.
- Wrestled (WWE Style) in a Main Event. I was the “heel” or bad guy, I got to be a jerk, beat up the good guy for 15 minutes, then took my fall. They guys in the back cheered and treated me like one of their own…that was awesome!
- Wrote a song
- Discovered a new style of painting.
- Started my art business
There’s my list in no particular order!
Merry Christmas everyone!
-Sean
I started college for the first time at 28 (I’ve wanted to go back for years, but couldn’t get ‘life’ in gear to do so!) and after 2 semesters of going to school part time and working full time, I have a perfect 4.0 GPA!
I also got married January 1st of 2011!! I managed to maintain a healthy relationship long enough that we got married, and then continue to maintain that relationship while doing school and work!
Oh, and I lost 25lbs!
I have learned to use my ADHD to my advantage. I still go off track sometimes, but I am quicker to recover and get by on track.
These are awesome shares. The more you sit and think about what you’ve done, how you’ve helped others, or simply moved on… the more you realize what you’ve accomplished. Even just the books you’re read, the movies you’ve seen, the friends you made a difference with. At work. At home. At play. Loving it. Keep em coming. And notice how you feel by the end of writing. This exercise really does alter your molecules.
In 2010 I began a very long year of long term sick. The good news is I was diagnosed with ADHD, along with SPD. Even better news, it made me realize that I actually DO like myself, just the way I am. I discovered that I do not want to be organized, focused(well, just a little bit more focused is nice to finish projects) or any of the other related traits I associated with “normal” people. Diagnosed in July of 2011, at the age of 57, I began taking medication, slow release Dexedrine, 30mg. This medication allows me to focus intensely WOW on organized projects and I can get a project done without flitting from one thing to another until I forget what I was doing:) That’s right…I said organized projects. Organized in a manner that suits me. Of course, this means that while I’m in that hyper focus mode nothing else gets done…whatever. Doesn’t really matter.
I like the brain surfing, I love using the internet to look up every little thing that occurs to me and I watch NO TV during the day. Progress indeed.
I am currently waiting for my employer to call me in with suitable accommodations to my diagnosis. I’ve been waiting since the middle of October. Not very good at waiting and I will admit that I send “forget me not” emails to my work supervisor regularly, but still, I am optimistic about my return to work in the New Year:)
I now know more about ADHD and SPD than I ever did before. I obsessively researched everything I could find about it in the beginning. Internet searches, reading books, reading blogs written by anyone and everyone in any way associated with ADHD:) A lot of information to process and I quickly reached a brain overload. Now, I have chosen to remain in touch with only my favourite sites which are upbeat and amusing. I also maintain a blog devoted to positive ADD information, tips and tricks (I also include bits of anything else I find interesting and upbeat). It is fun and I even have some followers:) Imagine that!
All in all, 2011 is ending on a positive note.
I also want to thank everyone involved with maintaining this site. The hard work and sheer volume of information must be satisfying to maintain. Knowing that you work on a much needed service and providing relief to others must be incredibly satisfying as well. I hope to have that too sometime in the near future. Good work everyone!
Thanks for the post, Rick, and for the great work on this website.
My comment starts out with some bad news but I promise it will end on a happier note, so bear with me! 2011 has been an immensely difficult year for me in several ways. A year ago at this time, I was enrolled in my first-year of law school, and I was completely miserable. Not only did I find it impossible to stay on top of my readings, internship applications and itinerary of networking events, but I was also feeling incredibly emotionally hurt after what felt like years of personal disappointment and endless criticism from my parents, my older brother, and plenty of other people in my life.
By the time I got back my poor first semester grades in January (bad grades are a killer in law school, even one rough semester can make it hard for you to get a job, especially in this economic climate), I knew something had to change. My legal career was going nowhere, and I didn’t really want it to go anywhere anyway (I had only enrolled in law school because I wanted to satisfy my parents and wanted to feel like for once I wasn’t falling short of my potential). More importantly, I knew I had to get my personal life in order. I had to resolve some of my long-standing emotional trauma, fix my relationships and figure out how to feel good about myself, no matter what.
Ultimately, I decided I had to leave school. Not only did law school eat up my tiny savings and put me massively in debt after just one year, but two more years would have pushed my overall debt close to $200K, the thought of which still gives me shivers. Eventually, I moved back in with my parents, which obviously hasn’t been easy, given my anger towards them. Looking back, I can’t believe my life has gotten so bad. In a lot of ways, it feels about as bad as it possibly can be. I’m dead broke, deeply in debt and trying to reenter the job market in the midst of the worst economy since the Great Depression. It feels unbelievable, but also like the logical result of a lifetime spent feeling awful about myself and expecting (and getting) the worst.
If all this sounds terrible to you, it often feels that way to me. But here’s where the story gets better, or at least starts to get better. Getting into debt and struggling in law school forced me to finally face my problems head-on, to change because I couldn’t keep going on the same way. I’ve spent a lot of time over the past 12 months working on myself, talking to therapists, learning about mindfulness, looking up ways to love myself. It’s obviously still a work in progress, but, thank God, I’m a lot better off than I used to be.
Also this year, I finally got a satisfying answer as to why it’s so hard for me to stay organized, why I can never read any books and why I have such trouble even doing basic things like driving a car. Per the suggestion of my mother, who was worried about ADHD running in the family, I went to see a psychiatrist, who diagnosed me with the condition. I’ve now been on medication for a few months, and I’m really starting to see some results.
Learning I have ADHD has been a revelation, and though I’m still sometimes terrified about having to live with this condition the rest of my life, getting diagnosed has added some important balance to my year. Now 2011 is not just the year I hit my lowest point and dropped out of law school; it’s also the year I finally got a name for all the problems I’ve had my whole life with concentration and moodiness and about a million other things.
I’m really grateful for all these positive changes, and I need the positivity and a positive narrative to help deal with some of the really crappy things I’ve been through. I remember back when I was debating whether to leave school or not, my 25th birthday came just two days before our spring finals began. Even though a lot of my future seemingly hinged on the outcome of those finals, I gave myself the entire day to just enjoy and do some things I really wanted to do and not study.
After 25 years, I felt like I finally deserved the chance to just feel good.
Victories over ADHD: 1) Learning enough about it that I can accept and understand it is a real problem, not an imaginary one – that many others have similar feelings and experiences. 2) Reading a whole bunch of books about it. 3) Understanding my learning style, what my comfort zone is, how I respond to the world – and accepting it. 4) Embracing what I am truly interesting in, so I don’t have to distract myself with the things I’m not good at or don’t have time for. Focusing more on my natural inclinations and talents, and skipping the stuff that falls outside of that range. 5) Exploring MY values and preferences, so I can devote more of my time to what supports those things and discard what doesn’t. 6) Letting me be me, instead of trying to be someone else.