Several years ago I was in Georgia delivering a talk called, “Making It Okay To Have ADHD.”
The difference a Coach makes can be life changing. The best singers and actors have vocal coaches. The most successful business people have business coaches, though they may call them contacts, mentors, silent partners or advisors. And of course, every athlete who succeeds has a coach, often a succession of coaches as they progress. And when they’re the best in the world, they still have a coach. Cause a coach sees what they can’t. A coach helps you win the game. Whatever games you play.
One game we’re all playing is ‘Life with ADHD/ADD.’
For a long time I resisted coaching. And I don’t think I’m the only ADDer who prefers to figure stuff out on my own. I bristled at people trying to help, because my brain was already struggling to keep on track, and another voice beyond the ones in my head felt frustrating. And I know a lot of ADDers feel this way.
Which is too bad, cause the right coach can turn things around as you’ll learn in our video about coaching ADD & Coaching: You Don’t Have to go it Alone (Now Free on YouTube).
That’s why we’re working on a couple of initiatives around coaching for TotallyADD. More details about that in the next few weeks.
Finding the right coach can take time. Many will do a preliminary session to see if you’re a fit. And many specialize in specific areas—teens, entrepreneurs, women.
Finding the perfect fit is up to you. But as I’ve mentioned before, there are warning signs that the coach you’re talking to might not be trained and certified.
Warnings Signs That You Aren’t Dealing With a Real Coach.
If you go to a coach and they say:
1) What’s your major malfunction, loser?
2) Martial Arts offer two advantages. They can help you focus and also deal with jerks who piss you off.
3) What if you just try harder and knuckle under?
4) Yeah, I kept losing jobs and getting fired too. So I became an ADHD Coach. Think about it. It’s a breeze! I just listen to people like you and say stuff.
5) Hey, if it’s any consolation I think success is over-rated.
6) Cut back on harmful stuff. Do more good stuff.
7) Let’s try a trust exercise. What’s your PIN number?
8) You did what? Wow, you are a total whack job!
9) To really understand your life situation I’ll need pictures of you naked.
10) Do you mind if I make an omelet while we talk?
11) Y’know what, the best advice I can give you is something Judge Judy said to this woman whose dog …
12) Uh, okay… So… Work on improving, okay?
13) You’ve got to work on your self-esteem, you moron. I can barely stand talking with you.
14) I can’t wait to hear how your week has gone. I swear, my friends and family kill themselves laughing when I tell them how you mess up.
15) Sorry, I coach so many people I forget who I’m talking to. Are you the angry slob or the pompous jerk?
16) Have you tried trying harder? That might help.
17) I don’t do Skype video because then I’d have to wear clothes and clean up the trash everywhere in my house.
18) Interesting. What do you think is your real problem, and the underlying cause, and the solution, and the action plan, and the best tools and strategies, and the first steps you should take this week?
19) Sorry for laughing at you. Usually I manage to mute my phone in time.
20) You think you’ve got it bad, listen to how my crappy life has gone so far…
21) Hey, at least you’re not as bad as the lady I was just on the phone with. Wanna hear about her? Don’t tell anyone, it’s confidential…
22) Hang on, I’m going to have to put you on hold, they’re just announcing the winning lottery numbers.
23) I’ve done a lot of work with people who have AHDDAH.
24) Maybe you really are just lazy? Have you considered that?
25) It’s Genetic? Really? I didn’t know that. You should sue your parents. My husband’s a lawyer.
26) My goal is to make you as successful and happy as a Hollywood mega-star. Like say, Lindsay Lohan.