munchkin>It is actually possible to learn the basic boxes people use and fit yourself to the box that will be more likely to get you what you want – there’s something yicky about it, but if that’s what you have to do to put a roof over your head, that’s what you’ve got to do. I agree it’s exhausting!
I tried that for 10 years then 7 years. (yes, that hyperfocus made me ignore reason.) DOESN’T WORK! I can’t be packaged for employers, period. I learn that lesson and will NOT make that mistake again. Anyone else who can’t get a “regular job”. Suck in your pride and apply for disability.
One reason people don’t succeed in entertainment they can be packaged. The people who can’t be packaged do succeed often since they think outside the box. Comedy is great. You speak your mind and get paid for it. There are skills, but you likely have them already. Speaking truths that “packaged” people would never utter. Your stuck on disability, what have you got to lose? Try entertainment.
munchkin>I make a spectacle out of myself without even realizing it, and tell strangers way too much personal stuff.
If you think I do those rants on impulse, think again. Those posts take up to 2hrs to enter(a topic for another day). I have lots of time to think about what I want to get across. Some topics in person, I won’t discuss. Most of the time, I tell things as they are, not what people want them to be.
I think were more fearless than most. It’s hardwired as adhd. I remember saying as teen, “I don’t play by the rules, I make the rules.” I think were hardwired to be leaders. We made to stand out in a crowd, not blend into it.
munchkin> I think the “first impression” is unconscious for people – a product of their upbringing and experience.
It’s both. If your parents were racists, a rich person who thinks – “It’s poor fault for being poor.”, and various other forms of being shallow and selfish, you’ll likely be the same unless see yourself as flawed and become a better person. Our hard-wiring(evolution-genetic coding) is geared to fear anything that is different(not of my tribe). In the distance past, they were competition or a threat to you. Simply put we act like apes and don’t realize it.
I was watching this teen kids show studying it(and sometimes enjoying it) to understand why it’s popular. I realized how very shallow, selfish, and lemmings the characters were. TV shows mirror society or what it should be(star trek). Usually, those teens grow up to be shallow, selfish, lemmings. Society feels the impact of these bad personalities.
sugargremlin>sometimes we are wrong about what someone’s first impression of us is 
. for me, the first impression depends on the setting and the person. I range almost anything.
That would describe me as well. “I am who i’m with.”, star trek – next gen episode about the female metamorph. Watch that episode. I see a lot of myself in her. When I mentioned, “That I have many faces. You never see them all.”, to someone online, I never heard from them since. Clearly, a “packaged” person who couldn’t handle my complex nature.
If weren’t for my volunteer work encounters with selfless people, I’d believe the human race was hopeless. We deserved to wiped out by asteroid hit or gamma ray burst. I go sometimes just to remind myself that there is hope for humanity, social evolution.
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