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Anonymous
yay! i love feeling like i fit in somewhere at last!
… the library books…. my partner had an amnesty on mine last week- 17 big heavy books went back, many of which have been renewed for about a year- only one of which was read (the night before it was due back, cos i couldn’t renew it, cos someone else wanted it- an ADD book, no less!) another 3 received special dispensation after i promised to scan parts of them and take them back next week (not been done, won’t be done, or will be done desperately at the last minute while the bf warms up the truck and i yell “hangon! i’m just doing my makeup!” down the stairs while he curses me and asks why it sounds like i’m using a flatbed scanner to apply mascara…). i’ve finally got it set up so the library emails me a link to renew my books on their website, a week before they’re due- the fines were killing me.
the clothes… yeah- a huge part of me is so ‘in the zone’ about donning those specific trousers that i don’t even CONSIDER swapping them for other ones- its like no other trousers exist- i get completely sidetracked and end up late cos i ended up organising my coloured pencils- which i discovered were messy while looking for sewing thread, after deciding to sew them…. and end up just wearing them with industrial carpet tape hemming them up on the inside, crunching and adhering myself around the mall all day.
the automated phonelines… argh! i usually mash # repeatedly in the desperate hope i’ll get directed to an agent (sometimes actually works), or if its one that i have to talk to, i garble incoherantly- after about 3 tries it gets a person for me to garble slightly more coherantly at.
i can’t go through the whole ‘press three for blahdeblah’ thing unless i either talk to the automated voice along the way “allrightythen, imma press three if thats what you advise- incidently that is a lovely accent you have- is it yugoslavian? oh really… your mother was part catfish and your father was an elderberry, that explains it!…. whats that you say- my call is important to you? well, splendid old chap! its important to me too! what a coincidence! say, do you like ketchup? i love ketchup!….” or unless i just press numbers randomly with a lot of enthusiasm, and then get the poor agent who finally ends up with me to transfer me to wherever it is that i’m supposed to be… “erm, i think i pressed a wrong button, is this blahdeblah? no? can you transfer me?!…..” … that only works when i can remember who i’ve called, and why, though.