Reply To: A Gift?

[shutterbug55]

Hello Tyler,

I am one of those who thinks ADD is a curse. How do I know? You can return gifts.

For me, there is very little up-side to this condition. It has affected every aspect of my life. I fail so much at so many things, there are a lot of things I don’t even try any more, because I already know how it will end. I am smart, but you would never know it from my school work, or my work work. Brains? Sometimes they are a curse as well. I am aware enough that I know how this condition has affected me and I can see how it affects those around me. Yet I am unable to do anything about it.

Since I know I disappoint people constantly with my oversights and forgetfulness, I try too hard to please them, and end up a living doormat.

I am never happy, never at peace, never content. I can’t tell you how much money I have lost through impulsive business decisions. It’s like one part of my head watches the other make the mistakes, while being unable to stop it.  The list goes on.

I spend a lot of time, energy and money with people who are trying to put the pieces of my life back together. Blessing? I say curse. Lives are not in shambles due to blessings.

I watch people breeze through life without a care in the world. I know they have problems somewhere, I know they have problems, but those are insignificant compared to mine and I would trade with them in a New York minute. I have a cosmic “Kick Me” sign on my back, because I am a lightning rod for disaster. Sooner or later the mistakes I constantly make add up to a disaster that nobody can ignore and I am on to my next former place of employment.

I try to see the positive, but today I just can’t.

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