The Forums › Forums › For The Non-ADD › Other › Mom of 29 yr old ADD daughter needs advice! › Reply To: Mom of 29 yr old ADD daughter needs advice!
@fromthisdayforward – I hope things are getting better for you and your daughter. I’ve been on meds for a few months now and on a recent visit with my doc I expressed disappointment that things weren’t as improved as I’d hoped. Then as we discussed how I’ve been spending my time, there were all kinds of little victories!
Perhaps focussing on the successes, however small, can help change her trajectory. Rather than highlighting the screw-ups (trust me, we beat ourselves more than anyone, regardless of how unconcerned we may appear on the outside), maybe simply acknowledging her struggles (whether you understand them or not) and praising her achievements will make a difference for her.
I know when my doctor pointed out that making hummus from scratch for my birthday party was actually a big deal, it put a smile on my face and gave me something to feel proud of. It’s a little thing, but having someone recognize that for me this was actually a big thing, well that was invaluable and gave me self-confidence boost that I really needed.
It’s not an easy disorder to understand if you aren’t living it inside yourself, but just by being on this forum you are demonstrating that you have a desire to be a part of her solutions. I actually asked my dad to make doctors’ appointments for me and to help me get to them. I knew I needed the help, and he did it without judgment and without making me feel bad. We all need different tools to get through the day. You’ll just have to figure out what tools you might be able to offer that will help your daughter alter her path a little bit. Loving her unconditionally is the best help you can offer her.
Best of luck to both of you!!
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