Reply To: To Confront or Not to Confront…

[blackdog]

It depends a lot on the situation, and how important the relationship is to you. I would say rather than using the old start with a positive then hit them over the head tactic it’s better to try framing the whole thing as positively as possible.

Example: Instead of saying “you’ve been a real b**ch to me”, try saying something like “I’m sure you don’t mean to do it, but you really hurt my feelings when you ______”.

Gawd, I can’t believe I am saying that. Its the kind of sappy crap that makes me sick when I hear it. 🙄

I am probably the worst person to give any kind of advice about relationships. I’m the one who tells the boss what I really think, or mouths off to other employees who then go and tell the boss, and gets fired. And certain members of my family will barely acknowledge my existence. It’s not entirely my fault. In fact, it’s mostly theirs. But it all started with me telling them what I think.

I also endure disrespect for much longer than I should. There were countless times when I should have just said take this job and shove it, but I stayed and kept plodding away, deluding myself into thinking eventually they would notice how hard I’m working, see how valuable I was. I let people treat me like a doormat, just for the sake of keeping the job, or the friendship. Like the one friend who would call me up and ask if I wanted to go shopping with her, and then leave me sitting in the car to watch her kids so she could do her shopping without them getting in the way.

So I guess the best advice I could give is: Don’t be like me. 😯

 

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