Reply To: Untapped potential?

[seabassd]

@robynshnobyn

Thanks for being so open and honest about your thoughts, feelings and struggles. Your description of your struggles with motivation hits close to home. It always amazes me how much everyone on this forum has in common regardless of age (I’m 47), gender, education, etc. I remember the struggles I had at your age. I think what happens is that we’re transitioning into the land of adult expectations. There’s an increased sense of pressure for us to fall into line. I don’t know about you, but I don’t respond well to external pressures. You just want to tell everyone to leave you alone so you can figure it out. For me when I was your age I eventually impulsively enlisted in the military after watching the movie “An Officer and A Gentleman” . Let me just say that things didn’t turn out that great. I wanted the military to fix me, to make me into a good person. I had no clue what was going on with me. I just knew the years that had past were full of struggle. I’m so glad that you’re finding out about this now, and I think it’s great that you’re reaching out. Do me a favor, don’t enlist without some consult first. 🙂

I’ve always tried to find something to wake me up, that would give me the motivation that you are talking about. The normal stuff that motivates others, just doesn’t seem to do it for us. For me, I think it was this idea that a bolt of lightning would come down and change everything. Never seemed to happen though. Well, the ADHD diagnosis came pretty close. THANK GOD!

What works for some may not work for others. I can only say what has worked for me.

Meditation on some level helps me distance my thoughts from my actions. It helps calm my mind and decreases the emotional disregulation and impulsivity. I’m not talking about some obsessive religious idea or practice, just a simple down to earth concept. There’s a book that focuses on ADHD and MEDITATION. I can’t remember the name of it, but others on this forum will be able to tell you. The book can be found in the store on this site.

Don’t overthink things(easier said than done). What I believe that I’m doing when I am overthinking or over-philosophizing (is that spelled right?) is that I’m searching for that bolt of lightning to wake my brain up. My brain loves struggle and anxiety. Negative thinking is another thing my brain uses to try to wake itself up.

Motivation comes with the first step. I pick the smallest thing to do and do it. I’m talking really small. Take the computer out of sleep mode or make it to the coffee maker, put on shoes,etc. then I pick another thing. Before I know it my starter motor has kicked in. Remember, we’re like an old car that doesn’t want to start, but once it gets started it does pretty o.k. at least until it has to be started again (talking about task changing).

Try to get sleep. Find out how much you need. I need 9 hours to feel really good. With 6 to 8 I can function (sliding scale).

There’s more stuff, but I don’t remember and to be honest I can’t focus any longer.

 

Keep it simple, when you can. 🙂

 

 

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