Reply To: Work in Progress

[Robbo]

The parenting business is too important to clown around. So I’ll try to keep that part of me at bay tonight. Got some protein in my belly. I’m actually a bit mellowed out too. So I don’t feel any need to sip on some strong coffee for that ritalin like effect. Brace yourself gang. For once I’m gonna try to be a lil more serious.

@megan I’m not sure I want to take very seriously all the stuff people say about men needing to “get in touch with their female side” And I haven’t seen anyone use that language in this forum. It’s old stuff. All I know is old stuff. Haven’t been a parent to the very young for a few years now. I didn’t do a heck of a lot of parenting in general so I’ll keep my ideas brief. As much as is possible. Yeah right, huh?.

even though I had no idea what was going on for most of it- and I try to encourage him when I can, though I thought it was hard before when he has ADHD, now he has it and he’s starting puberty and the whole ‘challenge every adult’ thing, and it’s exhausting.

Kids learn much more by watching us grown ups than they do listening to us. It sucks but it’s true. They watch how we talk as it compares to how we behave too. That ain’t no fun but it’s the way it is. I bet if you keep on being the concerned parent that you are he will see that. He will be a concerned parent when he grows up. You don’t know how to act like a man. He won’t hold that against you. I hope you can find some men you respect and would like to have your son watch. He’ll watch and learn. At the same time, you can show him what a grown up person looks like. Both sexes are pretty much the same there. Mostly. Us men, we got it all figured out. You women. Well heck, I just don’t get you!. hehe. Sorry, I find if very difficult to be serious. It was worth a shot. I learned just as much watching moms as dads. They’re all grown ups.

I’m Child-like. I remember another person in this forum talking about how she had a super fun time with her kids, and how she would sometimes be like a child and other times more grown up. I bet kids need both of those acts in us. Mostly they need us to have some confidence. They are much more aware of everything we do that we realize. When we get older we get to see the amazing result of our funbling and bumbling. Life in general is much more forgiving that we sometimes are. We learn to give self a break though. Please remember to give self a break. Especially the parent part of self. [self I hereby give thee a break] Do that quite often. Kids need ya relaxed. It’s also good for them to see you calm yourself down when you are not relaxed. This is the part where they really pay attention, even though you’re a wreck!. Not fun but trust me, it gets easy. Then hard, then different.

A mess is okay. I remember one time my mom (gramma) seemed to be trying to tell me something. But I missed it. Tonight I finally got it. Mom and Dad very likely had ADHD. Really BAD!~!! I mean a total mess real bad!! One day when I was dragging my paralized butt outa bed into the chair. Feeling like crap because I was back in mom n dad’s0 spare bedroom again at age 31. Bummed!!! way bummed. Mom n dad’s bedroom was the worst I’d seen it. (not really, but for this story is was awful) One of the grand-kids came over. Walked straight into gramma n gramps bedroom and said “look mom!!” the lil brat though it was super cool how gramma n grams had Sooo Much Stuff!!!. lol. Uncle Robert was mortified!. Whoops (robbo) But grandkids didn’t care at all. They just wanted gramma n grampa’s love. That’s how boys are especially megan. I don’t undertand girls. But I know my kiddo is doing great now that she’s 24.

It’s okay to want to throttle them 🙂 After feeling that, show them how you calm yourself down too. Rick and Patrick talk a lot about meditation and breathing in through the nose, out through the mouth at the end of ADD and Mastering It. I bet you love that. Have you guys gotten that one?. Chocked full of solutions friends!. I gonna go watch agen. [that weren’t a typo] I’m more careful now that we don’t get to edit our posts.

This is all encouragement. Just making sure you know. It only seems like I’m taking my time and thoroughly answering some parts of your post cuz I am. Not all of it though. I ain’t no termite.

The stuff Larynxa says. Ditto. She’s smart. And I really like what you say about manners and respect for the elders. All elders. I’ve found that respecting my elders can be especially helpful in my own lil community neighborhood where I live. All my neighbors are versions of Aunt Rose. I wish I had my very own little barrel-shaped Aunt Rose, She sounds great!. You remind me of an old girlfriend sdwa. I keep thinking you’re her in disguise, married, and with a really cool Aunt. 🙂 I need to quit trippin!. lol. I miss what’shername. She was truly cool. It’s okay that she’s not around any more.

Great question MrMcKay

“how do you deal with a  kid who wants to wear dress up clothes all the time?

When my kid was little she always had to have that huge fluffy white dress with the endless frizzle and (some girly word) that I endlessly kept on sewing because I didn’t care about a her playing on the jungle gym with it on. It was made out of some kind of nylon something that came clean each n every time. It could handle all that bleach just fine. Just went through a lot of thread. 🙂 I put shorts on kiddo cuz we were always climbing around up into trees n stuff. hehe. cute, huh?. That’s the only thing kiddo cried about when Dad got injured. “We” wouldn’t be able to climb trees any more. We had excellent memories. Tons. Dad and Kiddo are doing great today.

Thanks TotallyADD.com, love you a lot Rick, n Ava for keeping him alive n well. We hope you guys are having a super time in that big giant ship we imagine you on.  Bring us some picture of you two eating Salmon. ***warm smile***

REPORT ABUSE