Quiz for Idiots

By Rick Green

This is the quiz I want to give people when I hear them spouting nonsense. I mean, yes, I love all people dearly. And yes, I was just as uninformed at one point. Or probably I was, I don’t remember much beyond last week. And OK, this is more of an emotional rant than a quiz but…sometimes, when I hear someone going on, with a smug, all-knowing, arrogance, I want to give them this quiz I made up. And with as many people as possible witnessing them answer the questions. I would never actually do this, cause making people wrong NEVER gets them to see the other side.
But it’s fun to imagine sometimes…

Please answer the questions in order. Put a checkmark to the left of your answer – yes or no.
1. Do you oppose the use of stimulants to help people with ADHD or ADD with focusing and being able to control impulsivity and restlessness?
[  ] YES     [  ] NO
2. Do you ever consume coffee, tea, colas, chocolate or any other food products that contain caffeine?
[  ] YES     [  ] NO

3. Did you know that caffeine is a stimulant and that has numerous side effects?
[  ] YES     [  ] NO
4. Do you know anything factual about ADHD medications, about how much they have been studied or how safe they are?
[  ] YES     [  ] NO
5. Do you believe ADHD is overdiagnosed?
[  ] YES     [  ] NO
7. Do you actually have the faintest idea what % of the population falls into the ADHD/ADD spectrum?
[  ] YES     [  ] NO
8. Do you think that might be a good thing to know before you shoot your mouth off?
[  ] YES     [  ] NO
9. Did you know the best studies suggest the rates in adults are at least 4%?
[  ] YES     [  ] NO

10. Did you know that less than 1% of adults have been diagnosed, so in fact, it is wildly under-diagnosed?
[  ] YES     [  ] NO
11. Will you take a few minutes at some point to get informed so you don’t make such a fool of yourself in the future and offend a whole bunch of people who are dealing with this disorder?
[  ] YES     [  ] NO
Thank you for filling out this questionnaire.
We do NOT value your opinion and you probably now have a sense of why we don’t.

Have a nice day.


  1. Avatar
    memzak December 1, 2011 at 11:40 am

    OMG! If only we could! I know a whole bunch of people I’d like to give that quiz to. To my joy and surprise my family has been taken off that list. My brother finally realized that he has it although many years ago he had chosen the perfect profession for himself and is very happy. I have educated myself to the point where I can explain the basics in under a minute so that people can understand. My mother was fascinated when I told her some of the things I do and when she said that she does all that too I could tell her that yes she has it and launch into my basic explanation.
    Rick, I want to thank you again and again because without your show and this website I would still be struggling and unhappy. This site has helped me so many times and pointed me in the right direction again and again. THANK YOU RICK.

  2. Avatar
    jpsimard December 1, 2011 at 1:31 pm

    Oh God. I might print this out and just carry it with me.

  3. Avatar
    no_dopamine December 1, 2011 at 1:33 pm

    LOL, I saw the title QUIZ FOR IDIOTS and thought it was perfect for me. I’m kind of disappointed.
    I thought up a similar one for people who like to give their advice when you say “I can’t pay attention, I have ADD” or “I can’t sleep, I have a sleep disorder”, etc etc.
    … “thanks for your advice. I’m already seeing a fill-in-the-blanks-medical-school-trained professional doctor/psychiatrist/etc , but I will let you know if there’s a job opening. In the meantime, do you have any business cards? I’d like to refer my friends to you”.

  4. Avatar
    no_dopamine December 1, 2011 at 1:37 pm

    Ok, I guess Rick wants us to make up question 6 ….. any takers? or was it just censored : )

  5. Avatar
    kc5jck December 1, 2011 at 1:58 pm

    No-dope you can’t possibly be ADD if you noticed that there was no question 6. I didn’t even notice that they were numbered.

  6. Avatar
    Rick December 1, 2011 at 4:42 pm

    I am not sure you want to give this quiz to anyone! I wrote it to get out my anger and frustration. Oh, and Ava removed question six cause she said it sounded way too snotty. Wish I could remember what is was.

  7. Avatar
    rhiannon0828 December 1, 2011 at 8:35 pm

    This is beautiful. Thanks for the giggle.

  8. Avatar
    no_dopamine December 1, 2011 at 8:51 pm

    kc, I was reading the quiz to my husband and noticed the numbers, thought I had lost my place, that’s when we realized there was no number 6! I’m on meds now, they help.

  9. Avatar
    Gary December 1, 2011 at 9:56 pm

    Could someone please send this quiz to:
    my parents
    my siblings
    my employer
    most of my friends- both current and ex
    email addy’s cheerfully provided upon request.

  10. Avatar
    Tiddler December 2, 2011 at 12:34 pm

    Perfect! Question 6 guesses:
    Do you think people WANT to have ADHD?
    Do you think people WANT their children to have ADHD?
    Do you think you know better than the doctors?
    Do you realise that at least half of the people with ADHD attempting to read this questionnaire will have already forgotten they were reading it by now?

  11. Avatar
    Nunuq68 December 2, 2011 at 2:44 pm

    Could you also send this quiz out as a “Press release” to journalists who completely bias the reporting of scientific treatment breakthroughs and studies regarding ADHD . . . and then blow their objective reporting by adding the word ” Powerful” to “stimulant medication for children ? You never hear the describing insulin as powerful when reporting on childhood diabetes ? As a nurse, mother with ADHD who is parenting a child with ADHD. . . . I want this quiz duplicated !!

  12. Avatar
    Nunuq68 December 2, 2011 at 2:54 pm

    I so wish society was less judging . . . .cause I would certainly post this on my facebook page

  13. Avatar
    Rick December 4, 2011 at 8:46 pm

    I explained earlier why there is no number 6. Proof read and proof read…
    You would not believe how many times we had to proof-read our book, ‘ADD Stole My Car Keys” even before the Non-ADHD Ava and others went through it correcting typos!

  14. Avatar
    Sherri27 December 5, 2011 at 3:58 pm

    Oh my goodness this just MADE MY DAY!!! Thank you Rick! I’ve been struggling lately with people’s ignorance and judgment and wish I could print out a bunch of these quiz’s and slip them infront of people as they are belitling me. Thanks for a laugh and for making me feel less alone in this 🙂

  15. Avatar
    Larynxa December 9, 2011 at 11:27 am

    And the lesson here is, never piss off a writer, because the pen is indeed mightier than the sword, and a writer knows exactly how to use it.

  16. Avatar
    Larynxa December 9, 2011 at 11:38 am

    It also reminds me of the Monty Python “Bruces’ Philosophers Sketch”.
    “Rule 5: There is NO…Rule 5. Rule 6:…”

  17. Avatar
    mentalchaos December 10, 2011 at 2:21 am

    Very well done. Out of frustration I would have slipped into profanity by question 6….

  18. Avatar
    browna7 December 13, 2011 at 1:45 am

    Lol! I find this hilarious! Even more hilarious is I am female and have severe combined ADHD! Oh yea, do people realize many of us are highly intelligent and gifted in many areas? Say hello to Miss M. Ed with the potential for even more than just that title! LOL! I play music and have learned to play various instruments in two weeks just because they needed someone to play a specific part (reeds, double reeds, oh and drums)…Oh yea, learned to construct a porch…designed and built it to spec…lol!, Passed the motorcycle exam and vessel exam without ever experiencing either, but now I actually ride a motorcycle (yea, I didn’t take lessons…I just did what was logical in my mind and didn’t crash…lol!)
    Never under estimate us ADDers and ADHDers. We can do much in our world/mind.
    Peace out,
    Love y’all!

  19. Avatar
    Alex February 6, 2012 at 8:21 am

    Still find this amusing, and reading the comments made me realize there was no number 6. Haha.

  20. Avatar
    Microwench February 14, 2012 at 1:04 pm

    Yeah…I so didn’t realize #6 was missing.
    And I think that the fact that #6 was removed for ‘snottiness’ is hilarious!
    Thanks Rick!

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