Re: ADD/ADHD and High Stress Levels – Are Symptoms Harder to Control?

[Anonymous]

Shelby, I really like your this idea: “when I have zero energy I can start talking about or doing something I love and in an instant I’m fully charged and ready to go.”

I’m going to try that!

My favorite hobby is performing, and I do my best to be involved in any kind of musical or theatrical performance I can. While I was married my spouse hated my theatrical side (even though while we were dating he always pretended to be ok with it), and he never supported me and constantly made fun of me for it. I think that not being involved in something you are passionate about for years can really start the downward spiral.

Last week when I was feeling the most stressed I’ve felt in a long while, I took a day off work to participate in a Murder Mystery Comedy Lunch as a performer. The show went very well, and I suddenly felt as though I was alive and vibrant again. I got to do something I loved, and I thought I’d done a great job with my performance – which in turn made me feel like I wasn’t a failure. I felt like I was talented again, like I could take on the world.

Since then, things have come a little easier. I’ve been able to focus more, been able to cross items off my list that I needed to organize and take care of.

I’ve been doing better by making sure that everything I need for the day is already laid out and ready to go when I’m getting ready for work in the morning too. I haven’t been late in about 3 weeks, which seems like a no brainer but is a pretty big accomplishment for me lately.

When it comes to work, I understand how it feels to be looked down upon because you’ve been late even though you work hard and accomplish so many other things while at work. It’s silly that something like being on time can keep people from respecting you and all of the hard work you do! But those people who have no problem being on time are the most critical because it comes naturally to them. They honestly don’t understand how difficult it is for those of us who are chronically late. They associate it with laziness because they would personally have to be lazy to be late. But for us, that’s not why we are late!

William, I understand the mental suicide by ADD. I’ve felt that way when my brian is shut down. I feel like I’ve been bombarded and overwhelmed and I have to be able to shut out the tons of other stressors and responsibilities or my head will explode – and sometimes I deserve to have a break too! I can’t be everything to everyone all of the time and I need some down time of my own – so I push things aside and tell myself that I’ll take care of it after I’ve had time to mentally and physically relax. Which is okay some of the time, but then again I also carry the stress and the guilt of procrastinating on those important things I’ve needed to take care of. So I keep pushing that aside too – and then more and more time goes by, and suddenly that thing that I’ve pushed aside has become a crisis.

Now I’m in major stress mode because I have very little time left or now it’s too late to fix this small thing that has now become a huge problem. Then I feel like an irresponsible failure because I couldn’t take care of that one task – and then that stress overwhelms me further and affects all of the other tasks I was supposed to take care of… and now I don’t believe in myself enough to take on any of the other things, and I’m more mentally overwhelmed than I was before.

It’s this ongoing cycle … the one I’m still trying to get out of! I’m doing better, but I’m not completely back on track yet.

I think that we need to start believing in ourselves a whole lot more. We need to stop beating ourselves up! Because the more we put ourselves down the less likely we are to succeed – and the less likely we are to actually believe in ourselves. I think that is the key. We’ve got to start liking who we are!

Up until recently, my ADHD didn’t feel like a huge burden – I felt like it made me special and unique and able to do things others couldn’t. I’d like to get back to that place mentally. That’s my goal!

REPORT ABUSE