The Forums › Forums › For The Non-ADD › I Married An ADDer › ADD and marriage. Something to think about. › Re: ADD and marriage. Something to think about.
I read this post, and reread it. I thought about it and I have had to wait for a while so I can organize my thoughts. At first I thought you were joking, then I thought you were out of your mind, and now I think you are serious and I am ready to address your points.
In my experience, ADD or not, I have seen people who are completely unfit as parents. These are people who should have NEVER reproduced. Weather I fall into that category, I don’t know. Since my wife and I adopted all our children, we went through several rounds of evaluations to see if we were “suitable” parents who will provide a safe environment for the children. Had we had our own, the only requirement for parenthood, would be if we could fog a mirror.
As far as genetics goes. Yes we pass ADD on to our sons and daughters. Is this a debilitating condition? Sometimes, it would seem so, but there are so many positives that FAR out weigh the negatives. We and society have to adapt and learn how to tap into that vast potential, instead of squashing it by trying to make us conform. We are not like “normal” people out there; we think differently and the world is ordered for the majority of people out there. It is out of sync with how we deal with it.
For some of us, we need coaches and a support system to mesh with society. We take medication, go to counseling and we try to adapt. Society is adapting as well. Not fast enough to suit me, but hopefully fast enough to suit our children.
For us to marry and have children, it is a personal choice. If the government wants to test me and evaluate me as a “good” parent. Great. Let’s do it for everyone. let’s license people for parenthood. Governments don’t want to do that. They don’t want to take away that choice, except in the most extreme cases. Because once they do, it starts them down a very slippery slope.
REPORT ABUSE