Definition of Interrupting

[munchkin]

I have had trouble all my life with interrupting people, and I think I have worked pretty hard to improve.

Still – even medicated, I have people complaining that I’m interrupting a lot.

Here’s the twist: I lot of times, I don’t really believe I’ve interrupted the person. It seems like people get over-sensitive because I’ve interrupted them in the past, and it gets to the point where no matter how long I wait and try to let them finish what they are saying, when I talk, they jump down my throat about interrupting them.

I actually will get in an argument about it – “I wasn’t interrupting, I was just commenting on what you said,” “I was just trying to let you know I understood what you said,” “You paused and I thought you were finished,” “I DO care about what you have to say!”

Help! Am I just unable to understand when is the appropriate time to reply??

REPORT ABUSE

[ipsofacto]

This is a really hard question because the line between an interruption and an interjection is not a constant. It depends on culture, situation, and demeanor. I find that in the US, interjection is not as common as it is in the UK. Recognizing situations where, no matter how pertinent, an interjection is not appropriate comes with experience, and it’s always best to err on the side of restraint. Interjecting without causing offense requires tact, and it’s important to establish the reason for interjecting quickly. If it just plain Interrupting someone, it’s always rude.

So being socially aware is key. The other issue I think, for some people with ADHD, is dealing with perceived interruptions to their dialogue. This can be especially difficult if their hyperactivity expresses as continuous talking. Combine this with the degree of ODD we seem to have, and people can get upset.

REPORT ABUSE

[trashman]

don;t feel bad. me too!

REPORT ABUSE

[munchkin]

Unfortunately, I actually get resentful toward people, like accusing me of interrupting is just this cheap shot.

Maybe I’ll never completely get over the propensity to interrupt.

Does that mean I’ll have to be apologizing for the rest of my life and never attain some kind of acceptance of who I am – warts and all?

I don’t mean to sound like I don’t want to take accountability for my actions, yet I feel misunderstood, and that my interruptions are loaded with a bunch of meaning that is not intended. I’m so tired of having this black mark on every relationship – like a ball and chain of shame…

REPORT ABUSE

[ipsofacto]

I don’t say that I never interrupt, but I’m generally good at reading the conversation. Having said that, I do have a new awareness of my impulse to speak since I started working on mindfulness. I find that there is definitely an emotion, or feeling associated with impulsiveness. Recognizing that feeling, helps to rein in the auto-pilot response to a thought.

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

— knock-knock

Who’s there?

— Interrupting cow

Interrupting c-

— MOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

sorry. i couldn’t resist. it cracks me up every time.

carry on 😆

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

😆

SayWhat – You just made my day!

REPORT ABUSE

[Patte Rosebank]

Just had my first appointment at the Springboard Clinic.

As I sat with the coach, going over the questionnaire that assessed my strengths, and areas where I’d like to improve, I used my upside-down reading skills to save her the trouble of asking me the questions…most of the time.

When she got to, “Do you often interrupt people before they have finished speaking?”, I let her read most of it, then answered, “YES!!!” when she was about 3 words from the end of the question.

In comedy, timing is everything.

And it made the coach laugh.

REPORT ABUSE

[Robbo]

Sometimes it’s them. We’re not the only people who talk too much. I think it makes a difference who I choose to talk with. People who don’t have respect for me are less likely to care what I have to say. Kind of a no win situation. In those cases I need to find other friends. It’s not fun but I need to be honest with myself about how well I choose friends. I kinda feel like I’m back in social skills kindergarden. At least I know where I’m at, right?. I’m not bewildered and confused like I used to be in the strange and surreal world of socializing.

If I had any real understanding of social skills I would share them, this is just stuff I’ve learned since I started understanding how my ADHD affects how I relate to people. Why I’m alone so much.

When I spend all my mental energy not interrupting, I’m less able to pay attention to what people are saying, I don’t know when they’re finished, barely know what they’re talking about, instead I’m thinking about what something they said reminded me of… N off I go!. I’m working on doing more listening than talking these days, it’s sorta refreshing, extremely difficult, and it’s a slow learning process. Wish me luck okay?.

Maybe on a subconscious level folks sense my social insecurity, and treat me how I expect to be treated, like a self fulfilling prophesy. Low self esteem seems to attract selfish people who dominate conversations, and relationships. Looking back even as far back as high school I can see how my friends mostly chose me. I settled for whatever social contact I could get, not a lot. Those days are over with. I’m building a new and better self image, self esteem. Finding the real me, and also discovering I’ve always had some good qualities, I just haven’t always been around people that could appreciate them.

It always comes back to looking at myself, my choices. And how I feel about myself. These are just a few pieces of my puzzle. It may or may not apply to your situations.

Some people are just pricks. I don’t blame you for getting pissed off at some of em. It’s a selfish world we’re living in. I’m no angel myself. But I’m less selfish than I used to be.

I’ll cut my ball and chain of shame if you will munch!. Deal?

Just cut that sucku loose girl

LOL@ SayWhat, I can’t wait to use that one. Knock Knock jokes are the best kind of corny.

REPORT ABUSE

[allan wallace]

Yep, I sometimes cut people off before they’re finished, but usually with good reason…if it’s some boring bleating bore laboriously flogging an already evident point unto verbal death, then it’s fair enough I reckon. It’s bloody rude of bores to drone on and put people into comas with their monotonous verbiage about hues of grey. Grey is grey, no? Sheesh, they’re lucky that they’re just interrupted and not slapped a few times as well…

REPORT ABUSE

[munchkin]

I admit I do get impatient when I feel the conversation isn’t moving fast enough for me… I push it forward by finishing people’s sentences and then adding my 2 cents.

This annoys people, but it seems like there should be some accountability on the other person’s part too.

I know lots of people who converse and interrupt each other, and all the information still gets across just fine, it’s even enjoyable…

To each their own… trying to own my actions, minus the shame part…

REPORT ABUSE

[Robbo]

Yep, that makes a lot of sense munchkin. The one and only date I had with one gal I knew many years ago started going sour when she said to me “If you don’t mind, I’d like to finish my own sentences”. So, I just let it go. I’ve had friends here and there who seemed to be on the same lane as me on the conversation highway. (the fast lane of course). Not a lot lately. Just a dry spell, it will pass.

I guess I just have to be patient and wait for the folks I’m compatible with to show up. The big trick then is to keep in touch with those friends. I would have a busy social life if I maintained all the friends from the past that didn’t mind the quick little one liners and comments my busy mind generates. I’m a smart ass, so I need friends with a sense of humor. Plus my jokes can be pretty dry, so they need thick skin too.

If you think about it, I’ll bet you can think of a bunch of people throughout your life that really like ya exactly how you are. Lots of us like each other here for example. I’m still really amazed at the lack of any truly mean spirited “character assassination” going on here. Almost like we’re too polite, almost only counts in horse shoes and hand grenades, right?. We’re already hard enough on ourselves. I bet that’s why folks are not very critical of others here. Mostly…

I’m super glad we have so many folks sticking around here for the long haul. I can count on a bunch of familiar personalities here that I like. I get real security knowing I can read about how folks are getting along with their different flavors of ADHD, making progress. It’s a party, a circus, a zoo of zaniness!. A carnival of craziness, um…. a compost of compassion, a cornucopia of complexes, and more stuff too, but I should quit my silly slobbering of brain salivation, huh?. I’m just hungry for humor, starving for slapstick, jonesing for jokes.

REPORT ABUSE

[Author]

Posts