Re: 32 years old and I finally put two and two together

[Anonymous]

Here I am at the ripe old age of 53 at my wits end because I’ve just blown a great employment opportunity and fear I’ll never be able to get on track. My employer gave me an opportunity to head up a huge project, but it meant a lot of organization. Hard work wasn’t a problem, I’ve always been able to take on any challenge, but this was intense. I worked 12-16 hour days for months, but never seemed to get anywhere. I found this website through watching part of a PBS special on ADD and felt like someone just hit me on head with a hammer. All those sleepless nights, wasted days trying to figure out why can’t I get to the other side. I wouldn’t call myself smart, but very creative and desperate to succeed. Lots of ideas, but no follow through. Always feeling like I’m my ideas are a full glass of water so every time I try to put more water in, it just flows out and drips to the floor and eventually evaporates.

My childhood school days were difficult. I sat by the window in every class and daydreamed my life away. I squeaked by. Unable to study because I got tired of re-reading pages to try to make any sense of whatever I had for an assignment. And math, forget about it. Taking test or quizzes, there were days that I thought that I must have been abducted by aliens when we the teacher taught the subject.

Like some of you, I found peace in art. Doodled my way through life do I became a graphic designer. When people talk about aptitude test or SAT’s, I joke that that I just filled in the circles, then connected them so it made a drawing of Mickey Mouse. Hence, art school. The jokes on me. What a waste!

I’ve got to change things now, but I’m really scared that it might be too late in my career to get things right.

The thought of taking drugs really puts me off. I just went through a year in hell with my 8 year old son. He was diagnosed with epilepsy and was put on drug after drug, none of them worked and all the doctor’s would do was suggest yet another drug. They turned my beautiful, fun loving, happy, smart young son into a zombie. We got lucky though, a friend suggested to check out the Mayo Clinic in MN. Long story short, he had brain surgery which (so far) has been very successful.

I am definitely the inattentive subtype. I’m in another world when people start talking for more than a few minutes.

So now what?

P.S. It’s a lot easier for me to write all this, I’m the furthest thing from a babbler. No gift of gab here!

Thanks for reading.

REPORT ABUSE