Re: feel like i'm wearing everyone out

[Anonymous]

Thank you so much everyone, the wisdom here is astounding.

Rick, I started to keep a journal the first day that i started on my medication, but I have to admit that i’ve fallen off a bit and havent written in a while and it seems like the habit of doing so every day has worn off and its done whenever I think it would be a good idea to write. A lot of times I just dont want to sit for such a long period of time. I have a hard time making anything short and simple like you all might do as well. 1 page easily turns into 7-8 and the 15 minutes I set aside ends up being a couple of hours of paper wading and trash hoops. I do feel like I have to explain a lot. Since i just found out at age 31 and lived a lie for this time I feel like people might think that I am “faking” it or using it as a crutch.

mmarcel, I agree being so inconsistent is a burden to me, my family is tried of how I used to be, and like so many other people in my life they thought that the adderall would be the magic pill and i’d be a chipper happy camper like they have dreamed.

I know that there are good days and bad and that I should communicate with people about everything, I’m just really frustrated with things and how things have been going, There are other factors in my life and maybe i’m using other things to worry about so i dont focus on the real isues that are bothering me. One thing about me is that i’ve always been told that i’m too smart for my own good. I know this gets thrown around a lot but I am too smart for my own good, and maybe that makes it harder for me to cope with and deal with things. I dont know.

I dont like my brain so much these days. I wish tehre was an off switch

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