Last year was my best example of this. I got involved in a project to find new ways to refine metals. We eventually learned a lot but… I almost failed my courses because all my money, time and thought was invested in this side project. I stopped the side project and missed out when it got published, sadly, but I DID finish the year at school without failing.
Starting and quitting projects because I throw to-much of myself at them or failing at other things because I completely divert my attention to a side project is the absolute story of my life, ever since I was a child.
I’m no pro at not getting caught up in side issues but…
My side projects are normally of a chemistry, metal melting, fire nature and need significant amounts of time and money just to build the apparatus to test out my thoughts.
Thinking my way through, very slowly and carefully, planning them out and then taking a huge triple big massive deep breath and actually LOOKING at them to see what is the real benefit I can realize from doing the experiments, has helped me a lot.
Sitting down and saying ‘well I will gain this, but it will COST ME this’ and taking a moment to grok… ever read stranger in a strange land? It’s sci fi but it helped me a lot with my ADHD.. ops distracted…taking a moment to understand the situation really helps me NOT get into a lot of these projects.
Talking with people and getting carried away into an idea is something that I still have an issue with. I have a rather bad way of dealing with that; I just refuse to get involved with anything, initially, reflexively.
I take the time afterwards to think about it, try and use the above approach to analyze it and then ether change my answer to yes, or let it remain as a ‘no’ I know this means I do possibly lose out on some chances in life, but I feel that also gain by not wasting as much of my time chasing dreams when I am trying to lay a foundation for me to build my life on (aka schooling)
“Are there any suggestions for people when they’re being impulsive to help them stop and take a better look at things instead of letting the feelings of being stimulated by this current “thing” cloud their mind? Part of me wonders if I am even allowed to ask this. I’ve been ashamed and hard on myself for this part of myself for a very long time, and some long terms friends keep saying to me I don’t seem to learn from my mistakes.”
I have such a hard hard time with this. It sounds so neat and simple on paper but in reality I’m still filled with feelings of inadequacy at not being able to chase all these mental butterflies. It’s even more frustrating seeing the people who are seemingly able to do so.