WOW. Quick observation-
I have ADHD and here is a super-quick response..and sorry for being blunt–also a trait. I am truly trying to help
I get the impression from your message that your wife is very insecure. in-fact so insecure she is completely stagnated…Inferiority-insecurity breeds inaction. -No decision is better than a decision–In this manner she will never never be wrong..there is little risk-and she’s secure in her personal spot…..(Inaction is often associated with depression) Her attacking you appears to be her defense mechanism…
I suspect that this mental stagnation has it’s roots in early childhood…and she might need Profession counceling by a specialist–just to get started on recovery (my thoughts -disclaimer)
On a positive side..
My wife sugested I watch-the program-“Add and Loving it”. We watched it together. After seeing the program we discussed its merits and she asked me if I related to the ADHD traits mentioned in program.
I related–Thats me – I understand..
Formal Diagnosis by a trained DR. IN THIS FIELD yes/no—- for me yes—
After formal diagnosis–I had ADHD—
new options— opened–
Medication– option yes/no . This became an awareness problem..
Was I aware my personality might change–yes–
Was I aware that there could be side effects yes
Was I aware that if I wanted I could stop medication and go back to the OLD ADHD ME YES
So the medication issue became a “No Brainer”
I am on medication-and I thank my God, Wife and DR.
Please don’t give up.. This whole ADHD brain-is complicated-
For me THERE WAS LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL AND IT IS BRILLIANT..
Good Luck on your journeyREPORT ABUSE