Dr. Umesh Jain is now exclusively responsible for TotallyADD.com and its content

Re: OK .. gonna let it all hang out here …

Re: OK .. gonna let it all hang out here …2011-04-01T03:30:28+00:00

The Forums Forums Emotional Journey I'm Scared OK .. gonna let it all hang out here … Re: OK .. gonna let it all hang out here …


Post count: 445

Oh Lord. What a mess.

I’m afraid nobody on this site can help you. We don’t know you. We don’t know your wife. We don’t know your history. We don’t know whether ADD lies at the root of your problem, or something else.

What is undeniably true is that many ADD people put terrible strains on their relationships. We are compulsive, we have tempers, we can be terribly narcissistic. And we don’t see the awful pain we cause those we care about… and who care about us..

Someone once said a marriage doesn’t start when you say “I do.” It starts one day when you wake up and ask yourself what the H*** have I gotten myself into? Alas, that sort of thinking doesn’t resonate with many people these days. When the emotion lies shattered on the floor and what “will” there was has dissipated, there’s not much to be done. Unfortunately, the modern world has become ambivalent about marriage. Divorce is so commonplace, its hard to find support, even among friends. You certainly can’t beg for love. It has to be given freely. And it must always be cherished and nurtured as the great gift is it.

What’s done is done. What will happen in the future is uncertain. Healing, if healing is possible, will take time and patience.

I hope both of you find the grace to work something out. But certainly, whatever happens, get help.