The Forums › Forums › Emotional Journey › My Story › The Distracted Violist: How ADHD has affected my Weight, Self Esteem, and Dreams › Re: The Distracted Violist: How ADHD has affected my Weight, Self Esteem, and Dreams
Gday Violexie…it comes as no huge surprise that I might have missed your point, apologies for that! 😳 Self-esteem is always a bit of a thorny issue, no? I don’t hold myself in very high regard, and what few dreams I have left I keep buried deep within for I only expect crap to come my way. I don’t mean that in a self-pitiful way, it’s just my perspective on how I’ve always expected pragmatic reality to manifest itself. I find the optimism that you have perhaps inadvertently disclosed to be quite inspirational, for it gives habitual losers like me the faintest glimmer of hope that there is a way out of the ravine. Years of cumulative disappointment in self have a very adverse effect upon almost every aspect of one’s life to the point of being static, crippled by the paralysis of self-doubt. If one is always told that one is a useless fuck-up that is of no value to anybody then one seems doomed to perpetuate this cycle of negative affirmation, if that makes any sense? 😆 It’s terrific that you’ve managed to achieve some very impressive goals in a super-competitive environment, and even though you might inherently know that you’d be held in far higher regard if you weren’t handicapped by the curse of ADHD, you’ve still managed to maintain a consistency of excellence that has carried you to where you presently are…you’re achieving amazing things! You’re still young, and you have a wonderful opportunity to do so much! At least you’ve been alerted to the beast within, and with treatment and meds you’ll be in a far better position to tame it than if you’d wasted half of your life wrestling with that sucker… I hope that you go from strength to strength, and get your accreditation with a distinction or two as icing on the cake! 😯
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