can the symptoms get better or worse w/age?

[billd]

Can or do some of the ADD or AD/HD symptoms get worse with age?

I have to wonder as I”m the most frustrated I’ve EVER been (maybe because I watched Rick and Patrick’s show and I’m now more “aware”)

My shortness with people is worse, though it’s never been good. If you are stupid, I’ll tell you all about it.

My concentration and ability to make decisions is the worst that I can remember. I’ve got a lot of projects – sitting, some because I can’t decide how to proceed, or can’t decide which one to do next or today. So they all sit until tomorrow.

I’m 53 now – I’ve “always been this way” but now, it just seems worse.

Is that possible, or am I just imagining because I”m becoming more aware?

Sorry, I ahve NO CLUE what normal is! I totally failed the tests and answered YES, and sometimes a resounding yes, or a yes squared to all of the questions on the virtual doctor test here. (and I type so fast I turn letters around a lot)

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[Anonymous]

Hey billd. I’m 60 and I’m ADD not so much (H) but I’m a tapper, table, cup, knee etc….you know what I mean. I too came to this site after watching that TV program. I wanted others views on ADD, I have a vested interest!!!. I have my own views and they are quite different than anything I have read (mainstream or saw on that program. I am retired now and a great career. I have had many ups and downs in life but so has anybody you want to talk too. “Life is like that”.

Where my thoughts differ billd, is that I think ADD is/can be a GIFT. It can be very powerful like anything else when harnessed correctly. The ADD brain for me (I can only speak for me billd) works quite differently than most of the worlds population not “Less but Different!!!

People whose thought process(s) are different than mine (maybe ours) have a hard time understanding where we come from and how we see the world. When something is different ( in a minority way ) the majority must reconcile it, and catagorize in a linear way maybe compartmentalize it is a better word so their world and what they see, makes sense to them. Are you still with me??? So what happens is the non ADD thinking people because they don’t understand who we are, and what we do, compartmentalize ADD thinking people becuase it’s different and voila we have a SYNDROM or an affliction. I don’t believe that is true….I truely don’t. I believe people whose brain works like mine are not “Less but Different”.

Here is why. We see the world different (again I will speak for me and me only) I see a very large picture that is more random than a linear person is ever capable of seeing. There are so many things I get immediately, on a large scale that a liner thought person will struggle with. I can also focus (when I want to, if I’m interested) to a far greater extent than most linear thought people can, or want to. I can draw back from that sort of hyperfocus state to the big picture at will and with clarity. People whose thought process(s) are linear are baffled by that ability. There is the GIFT billd, or one of them anyway. Question is what do you do with that, what is the gift, and what are the short coming???

Can I ask you a question…what is the source of your shortness with people?? Have you already finished the thought long before they actually said it, where you a mile ahead in the conversation??? Where you anxious to move on to the next thought?? Did you already have it but they had to drone on to finish?? It happens for me all the time….. So I wait for them to finish speaking. Are they missing the picture, and you know that before they are done speaking??? Frustration??? Hahahahahah….

If this is you I understand….. (it is me). I could go on and on about this but….you already know maybe.

billd, I was troubled by my thought process, confused, and at time felt “less” because I could not get my brain to work like those other people, until I figured out how this powerful gift works. I started looking into people who have the ADD gift and whose forethought and wide scope picture of the world etc. allowed them to do great things. So many actors artist and world movers and shakers, people who change the world not manage it day by day, have been ADD people, it’s astounding. One of the funniest comedians in the world Robin Williams is AD(H)D in action. I marvel when I watch him, he has harnessed his gift for the better. The great gift of laughter!!!

My career path led me to become a policy planner in a time of change in my industry (telecommunications). I started out a a lineman, changing jobs every two to three years gaining experience and advancing. The job I finally landed and retired from,happened because I was asked a question, and sat down and gave them my opinion and how the industry would evolve. I could immediately see how it would work years out and gave them that over view. My “GIFT”. I got the job. A few years later, I ended up being contracted by a national telecommunication conglomerate for a year to develop a strategy for the member telecommunications companies to combat the onslaught of open communications competition. I did it it worked wonderful!!! I am very proud of that!! The linear people who hired me could not fathom how I could that….what should I have said…..gee I’m ADD???

Part of the issue as I see it billd, (for me anyway, again I can’t speak for you) was in developing a sense of humour about people life and our differences. It gave me tolerance and enabled me to interact in a more socially acceptable manner to the “Linear” thinkers. My god people still think my behavior (verbally) is quite outrageous but I do it with humour, and it becomes more pallitable for them.

I don’t know what will work for you, I really don’t. That is your search. What I can share Bill, is the reason I wrote in here after watching that show was from anger and frustration. To tell me I have a SYNDROM and I need to be medicated to be like others is offensive to me. Sure there are medications to help you think more linear, I used them with good results when tasks demanded that. BUT, what got me where I needed to be was my far reaching, wide scope, instant understanding thought process, or ADD as they call it.

Anyway I have said enough, this is JUST MY STORY…….it may not apply to anyone else, I don’t profess that it does.. But I do know this…. if you tell somebody long enough there is something wrong with them they will end up believing it, and that is immobilizing, destructive and a detriment to their self-image and self-esteem, and can do them no good. But a Gift, I can work with. Show me the strength show me the YES portion and I can move in that direction. Unfortunately the school systems, which is the ticket to everything doesn’t recognize the ADD thought process and does not have a curriculum that allows people with those thinking patterns to fly…. so the alienation begins early…….it can be over come.

Not Less but Different…..

Don

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[billd]

I DO feel gifted, even my true friends believe I am – many come to me for technical advice (home and work) advice on cars, or have me repair or work on things. I’m trusted (at work, I get special confidential projects to work on). I feel good about my abilities, however, I could be better and more. I have the ability to soar – and have on occasion, but I can’t keep it up – can’t stick with it, or anything much for that matter.

On these:

>>what is the source of your shortness with people??<<

If i answered – I’d probably offend a few folks here! Sorry…….

>> Have you already finished the thought long before they actually said it, where you a mile ahead in the conversation???<<

Yes, absolutely. And I could often phrase it better.

>> Where you anxious to move on to the next thought?? <<

Yes – next topic please, I know all about this and it’s boring, or, you are SO wrong, why do you even bother?

>>Did you already have it but they had to drone on to finish??<<

Yes.

>> Are they missing the picture, and you know that before they are done speaking??? <<

Most of the USA is. All the reporters on the evening news are idiots, and drones, and self-serving, and narrow-minded.

There, I probably just earned myself a few un-fans here. I’ll get hate mail, and be tossed off the forums.

What’s amazing is that this forum seems to be a collection of very intelligent, thoughtful and caring folks. Where have they all been hiding?

(now I feel like going and buying one of those cool t-shirts.)

Alas, I still wonder – can symptoms get WORSE with age, or change?

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[Anonymous]

Frankly I don’t understand why this medical condition is being treated as a problem. It is neither good or bad. Its results would depend on what we do with it. The symptoms will not change with time. However our lives will change as our understanding grows with knowledge and experience.

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[billd]

Whew – no offense, but you must not have all that I have, or my son does, or you’d want it under control.

I’ve tried things – organizational methods (PDA/phone, those classes, etc.) and frankly, nothing works. It’s cost me a lot, INCLUDING A SON! (a son I’ll never ever see or hug again)

It cost HIM his freedom and multiple relationships. I heard a rumor that he’s back on meds and somewhat under control, but I’ll never know for sure.

Parts of it are not a problem, but parts of it are. Parts really “tick others off”, and I’m lucky some friends put up with it.

When it’s as severe and “over the edge” as I am – yeah, it’s a problem. And the other problem I see is that others want to argue when I want that part of me helped.

If you had chronic back pain, would you not want some sort of help? If you had tinnitus (and I do) you’d know – yeah, you can live with it, and other days, you want to ram a stick into your head to make it stop! (William Shatner wanted to commit suicide over it)

I miss important talk, I have to ask others to constantly repeat things, I have to read pages of books 2 or 3 times – I don’t see that as a positive. I”m smart, active, and have a lot of abilities I’d not have otherwise, maybe, but there’s the negatives, too.

I can’t hear that one person in a room with several people – can’t sort one voice from the “din”. I’m quite accident prone and it’s nearly cost me a hand, and my life more than once. Some day, I’ll miss that car horn, that siren, or the train……..

I’ve tried the “coaching” stuff, and I’ve picked up a little, but frankly, my symptoms are so extreme, and I have all the “multi” stuff (a perfect 100% score on the test here – a resounding YES to all questions)………….

Let’s just say – if I find a doc who believes I need some medical help, I’ll start there, and that might make me more willing, or able to use the other tools, perhaps then I can move on to other methods. But for now, after all these years, all these jobs, being yelled at, divorced, etc. – no, I refuse to just live with it now.

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[Anonymous]

One can never suppose to understand what it is like to walk in anothers shoes billd. I am the last person to tell another what is right for them or anybody else for that matter. My story is mine and unique to me, I write here only for purpposes of sharing. Tinnitus eh? Me too. Thought I was unique for years with the rining in my ears, but no. Common run of the mill issue. My brain mostly shuts it off….it isn’t often until somebody mentions something that it springs up like right now. Oh well.

I have empathy for people who have a hard time……with life and it’s challenges. I can’t help but ponder on whether some of our issues are our issues because of others preconceived notions of normative…again billd…..that’s for me and not something for me to impose on others.

I hope my musings aren’t taken as “arguement” or as any effort on my part to disuade you from seeking what ever you need to make your world right.

I too have son who is hmmmm….floating in life, for lack of a better term. He has managed to avoid any of the pitfalls that so many alternative thought process people fall into and is a great person, just the systems that offer so much to so many do not accomodate those people who are not from the linear school of thought. That troubles me.

Harnessing anything is particularly difficult, especially when those offering the harnessing solution have no real experience. How much success can one have describing the taste of particular chocolate cake to another who has never tasted chocolate cake.

toofat

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[billd]

HAH – now you see one of my symptoms – impulsive, and I jump…………….

One of my favorite movie scenes that pretty much covers the above:

McCoy: Perhaps, we could cover a little philosophical ground. Life

[pause]

McCoy: Death

[pause]

McCoy: Life.

[pause]

McCoy: Things of that nature.

Spock: I did not have time on Vulcan to review the philosophical disciplines.

McCoy: C’mon, Spock, it’s me, McCoy. You really have gone where no man’s gone before. Can’t you tell me what it felt like?

Spock: It would be impossible to discuss the subject without a common frame-of-reference.

McCoy: You’re joking!

Spock: A joke

[pause]

Spock: is a story with a humorous climax.

McCoy: You mean I have to die to discuss your insights on death?

Spock: Forgive me, Doctor. I am receiving a number of distress calls.

McCoy: I don’t doubt it.

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[Anonymous]

Hey bild, I find people who are ADD processors interesting. It is the linear thought conversations that tend to bog me down a little and require me to call on my tolerance and patience in conversation. Funny eh!!!

Conversation with people who can speak in concepts seems to stimulate me more, they can fill in the verbal stuff under a concept and we don’t stumble, and I, don’t have to go into minute detail, they can follow the large wandering circle back to the point. Hey, when it turns to humor we are a riot, it’s fast, it’s smart, and I enjoy that part of our life. Now where was I……..?????

Sometimes “crazy” is the greatest complement. The way we think, if presented in the right light, is delightfully humorous to those incapable of this thought process. We are fun!!!

God I like this site. Wonder if I will like it tomorrow???

Toofat

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[Anonymous]

Billd….opps…..here we are a mile away from your initial question. Sorry, rambling…..

Your indecision about your project car??? Sounds cool by the way. Hmmm…being a gear head myself I love to build, and create, it is one of my reasons for being it’s who I am, I know that and I revel in it!!!. I have so many visions of hotrods and bikes in my mind I know I’ll never get a fraction of them built for christ sake I’m 60 and still hotrodding and building custom bikes!! I have a large stable of them now that are completed, down to the finest detail. Hyper-focus pays off in the right places!!! Anyway my decisions (for me anyway) are dictated mechanically. BUT first…FIRST comes the vision….I must see it first in my head and have a passion to create it. Usually I will search magazines and cut out pictures of the things I want my project to contain. I will actually paste and glue them it into a complete picture and paste it on my shop wall. From there I DO NOT DEVIATE……stay true to my vision. From there mechanical requirement (and my wallet) dictate my decisions.

Hey it works for me….knee bone connected to the hip bone… hip bone connected to the…..you know how it goes. That’s how I decide things and keep project moving forward.

Crusty Dude eh? Me too. But I’m old enough I have earned the right to be crusty!!! As for stupid…..not my issue…don’t care. Folks get to be as stupid in my world as they want……it is an endless source of amusement. I find humor there…..maybe not the most correct attitude there is but it’s mine. I’m comfy with it, fixing all the dumb would wear me out!!! Hahahaha

Still Toofat…..

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[billd]

I constantly change my mind on my cars – but once the project is done, I don’t change it except to improve it. Maybe I found a better match for the original shade of black…….. maybe I decide to powdercoat instead of paint. I was going to rebuild the original Eagle engine and opted for a Jeep engine transplanted into it instead. One fellow told me to NOT paint my own Javelin as they knew that it would take 10 years, I’d never be happy enough with it, and I’d go nuts trying to get it “good enough”. They were right.

I’ve had the intake off the Javelin 4 times as I can’t decide – Edelbrock aluminum, or factory original cast? Started with the edelbrock – it sits too high so I can’t use a spacer under the carb as the air cleaner hits the ram air hood. So I pull it off, put the factory intake on and can use the spacer and all – but that’s not good, just doesn’t feel right to have this group 19 factory aluminum intake there and not be using it. So I pull the factory cast intake back off and put the AMC numbered group 19 Edelbrock intake back on. Now I can’t use the spacer again and boil the fuel in the carb. Can’t decide how to solve that issue.

But when folks bring THEIR cars to me, I’ve got them fixed up in short order – very little indecision.

The eagle sits waiting for me to install the new fuel lines and put an electric pump on for the EFI – can’t decide – in-tank pump, or frame mounted? So I don’t run the new line.

I sold my Yamaha 750 a few years ago so I could afford another engine – a rather rare 1912 Canadian engine – a Chapman. 7 hp and 2,000 pounds.

Anyway, seriously, can symptoms change, get worse or get better as we age?

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[Anonymous]

Hmmmmm…. all I can say billd, I get more comfy with who I am all the time. I find more humor in my own behavior, I am a constant source of amusement to myself. It is about us after all…actually about me…right!!! Hahahaha…. I guess I’ve learned that my natural quirks are kinda funny….so I giggle to myself about them, and share them as funny stories with others. Self humor is good medicine for me. Soooooo…….I don’t know that they either get stronger or diminish, or if I can do anything about that if I wanted to. I do know that as I become more comfy with who I am the less they appear or at least the less bothersome they are. If others have a problem with me, I guess that is for them??? I try be a good person, and try be kind and considerate, but I’m not perfect and I’m gentle with myself for the most part about those short comings. I’m worth it.

I don’t know if that helps or or…..but that is the way it is for me.

Back to the real issue the car…..can’t you mill the Edelbrock carb spigot slighty to lower the carb in order to use the spacer and re-drill and tap the carb stud holes if required? As for the fuel pump my thoughts when I build are if I have to take it apart again for some reason, what is the best way to assemble it and make that easy. I run an external fuel pump on my 47 Pontiac Lowrider. I don’t have to pull the fuel tank to work on it!!! It works great……I did the bodywork (my buddy laid the color, paint) and I cut and polished my paint just because I couldn’t trust anybody to be as compulsive as me….it is flawless!!! took me all winter everyday from October until April…EVERYDAY!! It’s sweet.

Isn’t this sorting all part of the fun……thank god for hyperfocus!!!! Hey….just got a call from my partner upstairs, the ADD program is on again, gotta go. I only saw part of it last time. Opinions are like belly buttons….everybody has one.

Toofat

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[billd]

I’m ok with me for the most part – but I know I can do more, accomplish more, and – I have to have and keep a job! So it’s partly what and who we are, but we still have to survive in a “normal world”, well, I think WE are normal, the rest of the world is not.

It’s the rest of the world that’s all screwed up. We’re fine. They need to get over it…

Then I wake up and reality hits- I have to work to survive, to pay the bills and eat. I have to get my work done, and “get along”.

Plus, even thought I’m mostly happy – I know I can be more and do so much more and accomplish so much more.

I don’t really like painting houses, or doing body work – after a while, it’s boring and I want to move on. I hyper-focus for only so long – then it’s on to something else that’s faster or more interesting.

I earned a lot of college money painting cars – a former dealer made me a deal – he’d kept his license so he’d go buy cars, bring them to me, I’d fix whatever needed fixing, repaint them, and he’d sell them. We’d split the profit 50-50.

I could do it then, can’t so much now……….. not to mention the other stuff I have to do, and the lack of space. Brand new shop and it’s already FULL!

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[Anonymous]

I can relate to some of what you say. I have a terror of boredom. I’m always seeing people with repetitive jobs & thinking how horrible for them. Even say, a famous singer who always has to sing his big hit. How can they stand it? Like a lot of ADD people I’m self-employed. ( Also have no retirement plan. Would rather go to California.)

I love my job but I also think I never reached my potential. What could I have done if I had “applied myself”? If I didn’t waste so much time looking for my glasses. If I didn’t waste money because I never got that defective thing back to the store, or bought another of something because I forgot I’d already bought it.

Anyway, most of the time I think it’s a different way of being in the world, not a disorder. I joke that it annoys other people more than it does me (because I’m always late, I forget what we agreed to, I don’t follow through, I “flake out”.) People sometimes think I do what I do to them because I don’t respect their wishes or something…I’m not entirely sure why people get mad. They don’t like to be kept waiting.

I’m your age & I don’t think it’s gotten any worse. I’m focusing on it today because of the TV show. So I have some sadness about for example how my morning went (going to take out the garbage, remember the Boy Scouts are having a bottle drive, go to get the bottles & see the recylcle bin is overflowing, take the recycling out to the blue box, see the Xmas decorations in the garage, put them inside, see the garbage still sitting there, decide to add the pet’s cage stuff to it, see the clothes next to the cage & take them upstairs, remember someone wants to borrow the carpet cleaner, take it downstairs & there’s the garbage still sitting there…and when I get into the car to go to work, I’d left the carpet cleaner behind, didn’t clean the cage & forgot my keys.)

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[Anonymous]

I’m reading as much as I can and realize that sometimes men suffer quite differently than women because of differing hormones too and not just the ADD/ADHD symptoms. I feel like some symptoms have waned but others have popped up or have gotten more intense with me. I too am more impatient than I use to be. I get irritated quickly if I’m distracted by something UNPLEASANT(like the dog barking or phone ringing or someone interrupts my train of thought, which is hard sometimes, duh!). But I need music in the background to help me get motivated & accomplish what I can.

My hands need to be busy like NOW(by typing on here, lol). I’m usually doing beadwork, which is my small business(self-employed myself). But I easily get so bored like ECinABw3 stated above. I hate boredom, so then I get depressed because it’s so cold & dreary now. And I know certain things have to get done and life has to go on but there are days I just wanna sleep & not do ANYTHING unless it’s fun & satisfying.

But I push through the mundane & I’m always looking for other things to keep me going.

I hope you get the answers you need, billd.

Modela

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[billd]

YES YES ECinABw3 and modelabb70 – yes. You get it.

“I’m a man, but I can change, if I have to, I guess”

Guys with ADD also seem to have a bit of an issue because big bad he-men aren’t supposed to have emotions or feel, or get down, or sad or cry and you know……. there’s all that BS. Hey, he-man gotta be with it, organized, on top of their game! Buck up, bud.

Maybe this week it seems worse due to the “awareness” from seeing part of the show and finding this site, but this has been happening now for a couple of months with me – MORE forgetful, MORE wasting time than ever, MORE indecision. Maybe I just don’t remember how bad it was a year ago, and it’s really not changed?

I can’t say that I have PERSONALLY worked with or been around a woman with ADD or AD/HD. MAYBE I have and at the time just thought to myself – now there’s a really cool gal!

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