Re: hypersensibility &add

[Anonymous]

Hi music_zg!

I just stumbled across your post and read it and I made a few personal connections to it. I grew up in a very unstable home situation where I had a dad who often came home drunk (or became drunk at home while drinking his weekend away). Not a pleasant home situation to grow up in, especially when I had the ADHD to deal with along with the other stuff.

I thought I had done a super job of handling things and managing well emotionally as I grew up, married, and moved away. Huh! Was I WRONG! All I had done was push all my feeling deep inside, without having dealt with any of the issues that had caused them. I had no self-esteem, no confidence in my abiliites (despite being tested and found to be very bright), and was afraid of causing any sort of conflict.

I hated to hear any kind of yelling (especially at me!), so I would do anything I could to avoid it. That included accepting job assignments that I hated, and going along with what everyone else wanted to do (hey, “don’t rock the boat” was my motto) even if I hated their plans.

What am I trying to say? Well, to make a long story a lot shorter, I went through a pretty horrific period of illness/surgery and during that time things came to a head. With all the stress of my health issues, I knew I had to do something to deal with my ADHD issues.

I knew dealing with that would take some stress out of my life and that could only help with my physical health. (Everything out there says that stress is a major cause of a lot of physical illness and I was dealing with life and death issues. I needed to be more proactive to keep myself around here a bit longer. )

Anyway, I decided to see a psychologist because of crying issues (caused just by driving by a hospital I had first been admitted to) and lo and behold I discovered it all boiled down to growing up in the home of an alcoholic. Try looking up books on Adult Children of Alcoholics. I have a book that I picked up and it described the various different ‘roles’ we adopt while we are still children in our feeble attempts to deal with the uncertainty we face as we grow up. I think you might find that this could be causing some of your problems, too. (your hypersensibility or perhaps hypersensitivity?)

I’m very ‘sensitive’ to any criticism of any kind. Yessiree, and most of it is due to the turmoil I faced while growing up with a drunk father who was always looking for any little mistake to crucify you for making. Knowing what caused me to react that way (my upbringing and a critical dad who couldn’t ever be pleased) has been liberating. I’ve learned how to move on and take control over MY life.

Hang in there! If your crying jags are causing you issues, talk to someone who can help you work through the issues that are causing them. Being sensitive is one thing but being so sensitive that it intrudes upon your life and ability to function is another. There are reasons for your reactions and there are ways to move up and beyond!

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