Re: Open Relationships

[Anonymous]

Right on NJ, well while she’s been gone we’ve talked a couple of times on the phone and txted each other several times. Whenever we talk on the phone now it seems kind of awkward. I told her about me being upset yesterday and she thought maybe my meds were wrong and said i needed to go tot he doctor (cause I was so emotional) I told her I was fine and I’d just went to the DOC last friday. Basicly to make a long story short, i told her I was acting the way i was because I was in love with her and that I couldnt carry on any longer without her knowing and that if I’d stay quiet about it without removing myself from her life we’d never be able to salvage a friendship. She said she was glad to hear why finally (since its been going on for 3 weeks now. That was when she was real snappy at me and yelled a couple times w/o being provoked. Kind of like she was taking something out on me. You know kind of like how gf’s do with bf”s? Anyways, she said she’d be home at 4 and to leave the key for her. I told her i’d just pack my things and i’d take them to work instead of going back to her house, I figured 3 days on a train would make her want to be alone w/ the dogs for a while w/o me. She got mad and told me that if she could punch me she would, that was yesterday and we didnt speak again until today. She txt. me and said she needed me to stay another day, their train is now getting in at 12am. i’m so frustrated with the train and i’m not even on it right now. her eta has changed 5 times in 2 days. i’ve made cancled and made plans and cancled them again. Seriously. Well tonight i guess i’m going back to the house. I dont work on sundays (although I do on saturday) so I guess I might be awake still. I havent decided if I was going to wait up for her or if i’d just go to bed hoping she’d wake me and want to crawl in to snuggle or some junk (hey i can hope and dream) on the other hand, yes she’s been traveling for the past 3 days on a train, then a nice car ride from chicago to indianapolis at 12 am. If it were me, i’d just want to crawl into bed. so yeah the alternative is for me to stay up try to avoid the talk, and then let her go to bed, I take the spare bed, or just stay up all night. I havent decided yet. I know what I want to do but its not my decission. So yeah thats that. we’ll see how it goes tonight.

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