Re: 20+ years of the same issues

[Anonymous]

Thank you for the support and the kind words.

My appointment is tomorrow and my Wife wanted to go to support me and so she can ask some questions which also made it a little easier. The fear, as I said, is that no matter what I do it wont work. I have lots of reasons to get this under control I feel as if my life depends on it. I cant do this two year pattern of building myself up only to hit a wall I built. I hope a medication can help me get it under control but I don’t want to be on medicine my whole life I would rather learn ways to deal with it but I am not sure that is possible as my brothers and my father have to be on medication for ever. I also would like to get the anxiety and depression under control. The thing I don’t understand is whether it is my ADHD causing this or they are problems I have as well as the ADHD. The anxiety causes me to really not be comfortable in situations where there is a lot going on and also when things are happening that I don’t like and cant change, say someones kid is acting up but I am not allowed to discipline them, will cause it to go crazy to a point where I have to shut down and just go quite and say nothing at all in order not to say the wrong thing. Also I want friends but I never seem to get along with them. I am a nice guy who is understanding and caring but I always seem to make friends with people that would rather prove to me why they are better than me or they just plain take advantage of it.

I guess its just one day at a time I am just going to have to take baby steps, cue the “What About Bob” quotes, and just take my time and get it right and understand that I will take good step and bad steps and I just have to keep my head up.

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