thank you so much for the very thoughtful response!
I relate so much to your hours problem!!! yesterday, I was the last one to leave work (an actually decent sized workplace). Last person needs to set the alarm. and i forgot how!!! embarrassing. that is just the kind of thing I cannot remember. So I had to call the office manager and eventually just told me to go home >_<. It is actually kind of scary to be there alone. I guess better that I cannot take home the work because I would and then spend even more time! I will suck up as much time as I have for work/school activities.
I also relate to the homicidal rage inspiring student 
. When I was a RN, there was this very antisocial personality patient. He watched people to learn their rhythms and find the very most penetrating subtle insults. He made some choice comments to me about the constant running back and forth that I do and how much time it wastes >_<.
I bet you are an amazing teacher! There is something to be said about prioritizing everything. While it turns into a whirlpool of a mess, somethings you catch things that no one else will catch. I am looking for a balance. Also you might save handfuls of students every year from frustrating lives of academic failure! I’m sure a ton of people on this board would have been saved years of grief it they had had you for a teacher growing up!
so glad you beat a pancreatic tumor!!!!!
I do have pretty clear bipolar disorder. After years of having it, I am seeing some trends which are not mood dependent. Right now I am completely mood stable, but the chaos is still here! I always feel like my life is a thread from coming undone or I am barely keeping stuff together. I always thought that the bipolar disorder is what would eventually doom my career, but here I am mood stable and unable to get my work done! I will lose this job if I cannot do the 8s and staying past 7pm is not an option because you literally will be by yourself in a large building.
I do have a psychiatrist and a PCP. I can’t get in with my psychiatrist for over a month, so I had hoped to bring this up at a PCP appointment I already scheduled for another reason. I need to start working these 8s ASAP. Everyone, including me, will be really nervous to try this because I have bipolar disorder and generalized anxiety disorder! Throwing in a stimulant seems like the worst thing to do, right? Perhaps, part of the anxiety is my wandering brain. I have long considered that the anxiety hinders my ability to concentrate. However, my concentration is the same or even worse when I am relaxed.
lol on the leaky canoe.