Re: Carrying a Guilt

[Anonymous]

I got up this morning, at 10:48, again feeling the SHAME I always feel for sleeping so late. I realized that shame is such a familiar feeling for me, that I have lived with it for my entire life, feeling as if I’m a failure, or a disappointment, and like I’m just not able to do what other people do. Of course, most of my life, I DID get up early because I HAD to, but now that I don’t, I don’t. I promise myself when I go to bed that I will get up earlier the next morning, but when it arrives, I don’t.

When I was a child, my mom “shamed” me a lot, and I always thought that this is why I feel the way I do, but now I realize a lot of it is due to ADD and the trouble I have accomplishing things in a timely manner, finishing things I start, etc, etc.

I believe I, too, have the “all or nothing at all” trait, which is one reason it takes me so long to do anything and why I procrastinate and put off so much. Perhaps walking will help me too; I’ve been meaning to, but I’ve been putting that off too.

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