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Hi GG,
I hear your frustration!! A book (actually, I listened to the audio tapes) that really helped me is “Difficult Conversations” http://www.amazon.com/Difficult-Conversations-Discuss-What-Matters/dp/0143118447 It talks a lot about the emotional content behind people’s words and what prevents them (and you!) from getting the intended message.
When things are falling apart or when the deadline is tomorrow, there is no time to sit down and say, “We have a communication problem.” Do whatever you have to to get through the crisis and then, when things are calm, ask the question, “What could WE do so that this kind of situation doesn’t happen in future?” That way there is no blame and you’re including all parties in the conversation.
Good luck!
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