Re: I guess its not self esteem. But what is it?

[Anonymous]

Your story sounds similar to my former relationship with my ex-husband. I wasn’t diagnosed with ADD back then and instead of frustrated he was angry and we fought for 16 years over the same thing: my failure to be a good housekeeper and thereby a good wife to him. He loved me and told me all the time. He encouraged me to do well but at the same time discouraged me because I just couldn’t be good enough. This as well as some other things ended up destroying our marriage but we remain friends. When I was diagnosed last year with ADD and told him this it was like a lightbulb turned on in his head and he finally got it.

Maybe a discussion with him about ADD and your particular difficulties with some workarounds that he can help you with would be in order? I don’t know but I hope you guys can work this out. It’s hard enough that we get frustrated at our own difficulties and mistakes due to ADD symptoms, but when we have someone else frustrated as well it adds to the stress.

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