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i wonder if they want you to quit because if they fired you, you might be justified if you were to sue them on the grounds that they didn’t work with you to accomodate your disability…. hmmmmm. i wouldn’t go without a fight- i’d be sweetness and light and seem keen to solve problems and motivated to keep being there, but at the same time try and get transferred from milk to *something* a bit more varied and less inclined to make me want to tear out my hair – cos how much milk can you realistically look at before you go totally loopy or fall asleep?!
– if i had to work at walmart i’d much rather work in something like returns processing where i got to talk to customers, help solve problems, and zoom around the store with a cart finding different things on shelves and putting them away, or as an order picker, doing deliveries, driving a forklift around the warehouse, etc- anything with more variety, plenty of different tasks, more interaction with people and objects, and opportunity to think and make decisions, other than um… milk related ones, you know? i might be a bit based cos i can’t eat dairy, but still.
i know that you’re kinda stuck for options when in a small town, but there has to be something with a bit more variety that’d keep you mentally interested enough that you don’t nod off- early morning hours are my biggest nightmare too- could you maybe be better suited to evening work- a lot of ADHDers suck at mornings- i’m completely useless and practically semi-comatose until at least 11am, myself.
instead of the video games, can you do something a bit more physical on your break? its hard to fall asleep if you’re doing cardio type stuff, and you could set a loud timer/stopwatch to interrupt you- which’d stop you getting too engaged and taking too long of a break by accident- videogames are about as dangerous as the internet for sucking you into a time vortex like that- you think 5 minutes have gone by, and it turns out to be 3 hours.
have you thought of signing up with a temp agency? if you do temporary work the money tends to be pretty good, and you get plenty of variety- nobody really expects you to be in a job more than a week or two, and it doesn’t get dull half as fast when you’re working here, there, and everywhere. quite a few agencies where i’ve lived picked staff up at the start of the workday from different places, and transported them to wherever they were needed- which might be the case where you are – handy if you don’t drive- or maybe its time to move to a town thats a little bigger- where you have more opportunities?
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i wonder if there is any way you can get back in contact with the job coach, explain the problem you’re having and the ideas you’ve come up with to try and fix it, and see if you can get her back on side. if the two of you arrange to have a proper sit-down meeting with your manager about the whole thing, it might be harder for him to squirm out of giving you some honest answers, really looking seriously at whats going on, and to avoid sorting things out- you’d have a witness and advocate on your team, and he wouldn’t be able to claim that you have an attitude problem if you’re clearly trying to fix the problem. its funny how quickly things can get moving when a bit of pressure is applied in the right way.
another possible strategy: have you considered approaching an employee who has been working in electronics for a while, yourself- someone friendly looking- and asking them if they could offer you a bit of advice/insider info about that dept? you could explain that you really want to be part of that team, sound them out about which manager is the easiest to talk to and most human, when is a good time to talk to him (cos you don’t wanna catch him when he’s really busy or stressed) just strike up a bit of a friendship- be honest about your desire to work in their department, approach them as someone who is ‘in the know’, and see what you can find out.
most people really love being asked for their opinion and being looked up to in the role of ‘wise and knowledgable person’, just like most managers with half a brain want staff who have a passion for their work- and if nothing else, you’ll look like a pro-active, motivated person who took the initiative to fix a problem. if someone over there with a bit of power was able to see how much enthusiasm you have for electronics and how much desire you have to be there, perhaps they could get you moved. the person you speak to when you’re sussing things out might even say to their boss in passing next time they see him “this really enthusiastic guy from dairy was here earlier- he knew his stuff about videogames, and said he was looking to get transferred… he seemed pretty cool all round, actually…” which would stand you on a great footing for when you did actually meet the supervisor- you’d already be in his head and making a good impression!
basically: your manager is blocking your progress- so its worth trying to find another route to get to where you wanna be. he might get his nose out of joint if you go over his head to his manager, and you might look like a troublemaker if it ends up making him look like an arsehole who hasn’t been doing his job properly, so going around him might be a better strategy- the manager in electronics would probably respect someone who was prepared to do a bit of legwork and then stick their neck out and introduce themselves to him, and your crappy manager might also be releived if he can wiggle out of having to deal with you any more- especially if someone else is keen to take you off his hands.
just remember to focus on all the positive stuff you can do for them, all your great traits and skills, and really sell yourself, while sucking up just a little bit. if you go over there and say “urgh… dude: milk sucks so bad, my manager is always bitching at me, i fail epically at being up so early in the morning, and i fall asleep all the time in my breaks… i’d rather hang out here and play videogames with you guys”… he’s less likely to want to get you transferred to his team than he would be if you said ” i’m working in dairy right now, and i work hard- but honestly- its not somewhere where my strengths can really be put to their best use. my real passion is electronics- i know a lot about videogames, and i’m great at working with customers. i know i’d be a big asset to your team, i’m really motivated to succeed, and i’d appreciate any help or advice you could offer me to help make that happen!”… you know?
REPORT ABUSEif you can get a partial effect from a newer med- thats a great start- it’ll be easier to actively work on the other stuff, at least- some benefit is much better than none. if the older meds work but the side effects suck- go back to the doctor and see if there have been advances since you last tried them (cos there are, all the time!), and work with her to get the dosage as low as you can- so you’re still getting something from it, but so that the side effects are treatable and/or tollerable. find a middle ground.
the vast majority of problems don’t go away when you use meds -they haven’t made me stop swearing, or stopped me wanting to be rude to people- those things are influenced a lot by both my habits, and my environment. they just clear the fog a bit and let you tune into yourself a bit more, so that you can think half-way straight. so now i can say “right- this swearing and being rude- i need to work on it. i’m gonna pay more attention to my speech today- i might not be able to avoid screwing up just yet, but i’m gonna try and spot the mistakes as they happen, apologise, and fix them right away- i’m gonna change this pattern bit by bit- and soon i’ll start to catch myself *before* i screw up!”.
with meds i’m able to do that a little better- cos i’m not getting hypnotised by the texture of the wall or walking in circles trying to remember what i was doing and run around frantically catching up, quite as much as before. i can shake off a stupid idea a little easier, cos i’m not functioning like a headless chicken caught up in a whirlwind- i’m more like a chicken with half a brain and some heavy boots on, clumping about on a breezy day.
you’ve identified a lot of your problem areas already. you know that you get into trouble when you play video games in your break, right? there are easy ways to avoid that- either don’t take your PSP to work, or stick a note on the screen of your cellphone that says “no playing games at break time!”, plan to go for a walk around the block with a co-worker at lunch- put a little strategy in place to catch you before you slip up. i know its more fun to play games than it is to accept responsibility and resist your impulses, but its no fun being yelled at or getting fired either- remind yourself of that when your brain says ‘just one game! its not fair! i want to play!’. similarly, you know that you suck terribly in the mornings- so why the hell are you working that shift? get onto a different one! if you need to, get a job that is advertising for twilight or overnight shelf-stackers, that starts when you’re at your best- for me thats about 4 to 6pm until about 2am. if you can’t change that, then drink coffee or cola, put a rubber band or elasticated hairband on your wrist and snap it, give yourself an atomic wedgie, or do *something* else to give yourself a good shake awake when you start to notice that you’re getting sleepy.
i know how hard it is to feel like you keep running into brick walls, falling down, getting up, brushing yourself off, and having another go- but in many ways you’re responsible for choosing to keep running headfirst at the wall- instead of looking for a doorway, ladder, or way around it. that is understandable, cos patterns are hard to break- but unless you want to be exactly where you are now in a years time- only with more grazes on your head and knees, and a few concussions under your belt- you need to sit down and realistically look at not just what you *can’t* do (like make the wall vanish), but more importantly what you *CAN* do (like get support, try new strategies, build on your strengths, find a level of meds that gives you a bit of an edge, etc).
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i think work wants me to quit2011-02-14T00:35:42+00:00
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