Newly diagnosed and think everything's going to unravel soon. I need a plan.

[Tiddler]

Unsurprisingly, I’ve had every emotion going since I realised I had ADHD. But my youngest child starts school in a couple of weeks and I’ve only had the odd bit of paid work for the last 8 years because I’ve been looking after the kids. The biggest contract I’ve had in that time finished in June and I don’t have much lined up yet.

So far I have the voluntary jobs I do:

An hour a week for a local kids’ group.

4 hours a week walking and training dogs for a rescue home (exercise and fresh air with a schedule I have to stick to – this is very positive.) Two 2hour blocks.

2 hours 4 days a week for a charity very close to my heart – changed from one 8 hour day because I just couldn’t concentrate for a whole day.

4 hours a week as parent helper at the kids’ school.

Sporadic paid work for a charity working with children. This is my favourite work, but it’s long distance and requires an overnight stay because I always get lost going somewhere – so I end up losing most of the pay. It’s great work though with a lot of potential for my future.

Occasional work as a supply teacher – I find this VERY stressful as I struggle following other people’s instructions but I like the kids a lot and it’s a good school with great staff and lovely kids.

The MA I’m doing – around 15 hours per week.

Oh.

I was actually posting to say that I don’t have enough to do when my boy starts school and I thought I’d be lost as we’re pretty full on doing lots of stuff. Actually, seeing that list is helpful. I’m pretty busy!

I love lists. I have no idea why I began this any more.

Yup – see what I mean about the mood swings!

My real point is that I’m afraid having that extra time will allow me to fester on the negative side of the diagnosis over the relief I’m (mainly) feeling at the moment.

How did you all cope with your diagnosis? I understand many people go through a grieving process and that’s what it feels like to be honest.

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[Tiddler]

Also, I NEED to be busy, all the time, but this is all too ‘bitty’ and I think it’s why my ADHD became so out of control that even my GP noticed it! I don’t know how to make it all more structured.

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[billd]

not so sure I like structure…………..

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[Tiddler]

No, I don’t either!

But I do think I need it.

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[Tiddler]

Do I?! There’s a thought…

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[Anonymous]

I felt relieved with the diagnosis. I’ve always been really insecure about my intelligence! I have always gotten really good grades, everything takes me 2x as long to complete and my brain processes at the speed of sludge unless it decides to skip thinking completely. my memory is sluggish.. always the last person to figure out a joke or react to situations. I thought that I was actually intellectually inferior in hiding, compensating by working much harder and longer. It is comforting to think that I am not actually an air head. I was also thinking I was completely incompetent to be in the work world related to being inefficient. ADHD is a nicer answer to the question of whether I am intellectually inferior, slow thinking, and inefficient.

and structure is good in balance. I feel trapped and miserable in a micromanaged situation. however, I feel like I am free floating and lost without any direction and too much unstructured time.

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[nellie]

Tiddler,

The stuff you enumerated adds up to 32 hours – add the “sporadic,” “occasional” and other stuff you either forgot or didn’t mention, and I’m going to wager you can easily make it to 40 hours. Which in effect are the number of hours in a standard old-fashioned work week. Soooooo, when exactly are you going to find the time to wallow ? I’d say a little more down time to reflect might not be a bad thing!

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[Anonymous]

I would rather be diagnosed ADD than think I’m a flake and lazy, or losing my freakin’ mind. It would explain a lot.

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[Anonymous]

I also have a terrible time managing my time and often over-commit. I guess I want everyone to think I’m a lot more organized than I am, and I hate to disappoint people by saying no.

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[greentree]

Well here goes big breath. Neve done the chat  blog thing before let alone about my recent add diagnosis a few days ago. I have a co existing ocd and anxiety which I have had on off all my life dealing with it alone. Always new I was different and struggled acedemically putting in much more time than others to get results. Anxiety had gotten over the top so thought id rather medicate for the right reason add. Iv known I had it formany years joking

but serious too. Having woked with chn for 30 Yrs last ten with special needs I knew. A long jorney at almost 55yrs . Relieved its out there but shit scared of meds starting in a couple of weeks. StRted a new career weeks ago as an AIN in aged care so I have to be on the ball and remember things in a diff way now so stress around all thats new which is much. Im just tied too of always having to do life hard. Hope meds can ease the hard . Now that iv been brave to get out there ill watch a little longer from the side lines for info and responses . Sunshine days from green tree. Cheers

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[blackdog]

Hi @greentree, welcome. 🙂

Please, don’t be shy. This is a very friendly forum where no one will judge you harshly or criticize you. And it is closely monitored and moderated. Forums can be lots of fun when the people have the right attitude. And it’s great to have the support of others. You don’t have to be alone.

“Joking but serious too” is a good description of what it’s like to live with with ADD I think. It can have a serious impact on your life, but it sure is funny sometimes.

I understand you being scared of starting the medication. It is not nearly as bad as most people think though. Just make sure you read up on it and ask lots of questions so that you know what to expect and you can make informed choices. And try to keep track of how it is affecting you. Keep a daily journal if you can and make note of how you feel, what has improved, what hasn’t. That way you can tell if it’s working the way it should be or not.

And give it time. It takes awhile to really start working and to find the right dosage.

Good luck with the new job. Try not to stress too much about it. If you can stay calm you will find it easier to remember things and stay on the ball.

And it is now way past my bed time and my medication wore off hours ago, so right now a snail could type this faster than me. So I’m off.

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[greentree]

Thanks for your  kind words . I cant believe im out there again. I must need this verbal release as part of my journey. Being anonymous helps im thinking. I have read so many others stories of meds not allowing them to function properly or coming down feeling bad. Being in a peoples well being field of work and responsible for their safety, I need to know im present and functioning. These are questions for my psychologists off sider gp I suppose , but i have to wait a couple of weeks now untill i see her.I feel those who live it know much more detail and can add variance of experience. Would I be better to take a week off work to see what happens. My brother was diagnosed at 58 after an incidental exposure to dexamphedamine. After a week of taking a small amount of it in another drug for weight loss his brain changed after a fortnight it was unbelievable . Then to psychologist for proper meds ,brother said it was nothing short of phenomenal. His brain turned on and he could see better.sure th hope thats my story. Brother said as others have theres some fiddling of dosages? Thanks again greentree. Sunshine days all.

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[blackdog]

@greentree

If you can take some time off work that would be awesome. It’s probably not a necessity but it would make it easier for you.  It is a worry when you are responsible for taking care of other people. If you think it’s okay to do so you might want to let your supervisors and/or coworkers know what is happening so that they can help you out if you are having difficulty. Be careful with that though. Don’t do it unless you are certain it won’t cause problems.  If you don’t think it’s safe to tell them the truth then you can always just say you aren’t feeling well.

Also, you can prepare yourself. Try to clear your schedule as much as possible and don’t take on too much. Make sure you are organized for the week, clothes and lunches and whatever you need ready to go. Get some help from your family and friends if it’s possible. That way if you do have a few days where you feel a little off because of the medication you won’t have as much to worry about and more time to relax.

That is, if you can.  I can’t get organized to save my life most days. But I do sometimes manage it for a short time when I know I will need to have extra focus for something.

There is often some “fiddling” for awhile until you figure out the best dose. And you may also need to try a couple of different medications. What works for your brother or another person may not work as well for you. And there is the possibility of having a bad reaction but you have to try not to get anxious about that. Just be aware of the possible side effects so that you will know if you are having any.

Talk it all over carefully with your doctor and the psychiatrist and ask them about all your concerns and what they think is best. Write your questions down before you go so you won’t forget them. If you want to you could take someone with you for moral support and to help you to listen and remember everything.

I think the main thing I’m trying to say here is make it as easy as possible on yourself. The less stressed you are the better.

🙂

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[greentree]

Im so greatfull for your kindness in returning my posts. I look forward to a response and think of getting on my tablet as soon as I get up to look. THANKS. To tell others at work I feel would not be wise, co workers or establishment.  There liabilities in care would over rule any compasion to the condition. Then theres personal ignorances and preduceses which one can not control. If I were working with my old intervention team it would be no prob but I will have to remember them as a highlight of chns career. Your support in taking a week off conferms my thinking so might go that way and taking the op of saying im not feel right at work aking others to watch my back. Thats one of the legacies of my intervention team, great loss there.If i feel its detremental to my elders then ill make that judgement. Worried i wont be able to recognize though.  As for organize I am always willing as my ocd takes care or that yet the constant double checking tiers me emensly.  If I have a lot on yes I get  overwhelmed so will minimize. Hubbys coming so  covered there.  Need to go have an app so till next time. Sunshine days my supporting friend.

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[kc5jck]

As far as making notes about how your meds are working, get feedback from you husband as well.  Often the person with ADHD isn’t the best judge on how they are performing “externally.”

I’ve seen people post that they thought their meds quit working so they stopped taking them for a day or two.  Comments from coworkers and others indicated that they had noticed an immediate change.

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[Author]

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