The Forums › Forums › I Just Found Out! › Who do i tell? Should i feel bad for telling people? › Reply To: Who do i tell? Should i feel bad for telling people?
Hi Reni,
It is expected that people will judge what they simply don’t understand.
The thing is I’m not even diagnosed but as I’ve tried to talk about it with certain family members I get dismissive feedback. I’ll be told that ADHD isn’t real or that I’m just making excuses – so to some extent I understand where you’re coming from. It is common for a lot of people to undermine ADHD and consider it a fake disability. However people with ADHD (diagnosed or not) may face real difficulties that limit them in various ways. These disadvantages and limitations are not perceived when they have real life consequences. You should also take the time to acknowledge the potential strengths that have come with it… perhaps, that will take some time to develop or for you to recognize. And in doing so, maybe you’ll eventually learn to embrace the good qualities.
Just remember that you seeking treatment is your way of mitigating the difficulties of ADHD. You have taken the step to ensure that it doesn’t hinder your ability to function at a socially accepted rate. In other words, you’ve done the right thing and you should not feel ashamed. Also, stigma comes from those who just haven’t taken the time to understand the nature of your situation. These people who are saying awful things about you are clearly not worth your attention!
My suggestion is to be selective with who you share with, i.e. those who you trust, are comfortable with and know enough to not pass judgment. Although I applaud you for being very open about it because you sure have no reason to feel bad about it. I think you’re fine in telling whoever you feel like telling as long as you remember that there will always be people who won’t understand and will be judgmental. The key is to disregard these people and keep in mind that you are not alone!
Take care,
Mary