Re: Emotional Rollercoasters

[Anonymous]

Clamdigger….you’re definitely not alone with this. I’m 48 and I just got diagnosed a few weeks ago although I knew I had ADD for quite a few years now (not on meds yet though). I just couldn’t find a doctor that knew anything about it. I felt as though I was treated like a kook for just asking the doctor for help. Finally, I went to an ADD coach in Oakville and she gave me some references for doctors / psychologists who knew what to look for.

Funny thing is for me, the diagnosis didn’t make me feel better at all. I had read in lots of books and many online sites that claim a diagnosis of ADD lifted some of the weight. I guess I’ve just had too many years of screwing up not achieving my goals and now I’m jaded. Now I’m afraid to make any goals. As I get older, it seems to get worse and now I just can’t seem to get myself to do anything. It’s entirely frustrating for both myself and everyone around me. Most of the time it feels like I have two personalities. Unfortunately, the one that seems to be in charge is a lousy manager. It’s like being an outside observer of myself. I know intellectually the right things to do, but I seem to have no control over my actions. I can’t count the number of times I’ve thought “I really shouldn’t do that,” only to notice shortly after, “oh crap, I’m doing it anyway.” If it wasn’t ruining my life, it would be funny.

I’m looking forward to going on some meds and I have an appointment later this month to discuss that. I really don’t know what to do if the meds don’t help because I’m all out of ideas and options after that.

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