Re: I keep imagining what would have happened without my parents income.

[Anonymous]

I was in your situation bguntoor. I went back to University at the age of 25 with loans and some financial support from my parents. They are not rich and are horribly unsupportive in every other way.

I was going for a computing degree and after receiving a 53% in one of my first year courses the prof called me in to ask what happened. She indicated that based on my class participation and work (minus the details), that she felt I should have been a 90s student easily and she was shocked that I did so poorly. She bumped my mark up to a 65% so I wouldn’t lose funding. That prompted me to seek out help, which led to psycho-educational testing, which revealed ADHD-PI. I was given the diagnosis, a 10 page report, and left to fend for myself.

Needless to say things went badly. Very badly. I continued having issues and had little to no support around me, the recommended supports for me were only partially available because the bursary that funds them ran out of money and they couldn’t get the rest in place till half way through my courses. After failing several courses my parents pulled their funding, the paperwork involved in getting loans became more work than the courses themselves and the bills increased due to the medications. At one point I was paying as much for my monthly Concerta as I was for food for the entire month.

I dropped out ~2 1/2 years ago because I couldn’t afford to keep trying. The results have been devastating. Emotionally it set me back in a big way, I lost all my savings (including retirement savings I’d had prior to starting), and I haven’t been able to find a job since.

Now you know the answer, so any time you think about that question you can stop yourself and replace it with thoughts of gratitude for those in your support network.

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