Re: Me-me-me? (post from a Non-ADDer)

[Anonymous]

I think my partner would see me as many different things. Yep, he’d say I’m selfish, self-centered, cold and detached. He’d also say I’m loving, sweet, generous, and compassionate. He’d also say I’m bright, creative, and talented; but then there’s forgetful, ditzy, scattered and confused. Over focused, under focused…as a song by Sting goes….”She can be all four seasons in one day”

I know it’s tough for him to live with, it’s tough for me to live with. Some days are great, others horrible. Sometimes I love myself and appreciate all the interesting things that ADHD allows me to do, other days I loathe myself because very simple things perplex me.

I guess to sum it up, I’d say I’m totally inconsistent. He is very linear and I’m like a circle with a ping-pong ball bouncing around inside.

When I’m restless, I find him very boring and get frustrated, yet when I’m calm I’m very grateful that he is so steady.

Sound familiar? In my heart, though I hate to say it, I don’t think I’m cut out for monogamy. Once I have the thing, the person, the car, whatever, I’m thinking of the next thing. I think the hardest part of ADHD for me is the feeling that satisfaction is fleeting…I can’t hold on to it, no matter what I tell myself. This makes me very sad sometimes and I’m sure it’s very difficult for him to live with. He always says that the good outweighs the negative and that I’m worth the trouble, but I don’t think I’d be able to live with me. HA!

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