Re: No Friends

[Anonymous]

I belong to a meetup group for Adult ADHD (in Toronto) but haven’t attended recently due to the distance I have to travel to get there. it was such a great experience to go to my first meeting and be amongst people JUST like me. It felt sooooo good to know that there were others out there just like me and they were all interested in talking to me!

Am I different than others? Yes, probably so. I’ve had some of the same difficulties as you when I was a young mom and had just moved here to this province/city. It’s a much different place than friendly Saskatoon (Welcome new totally ADD staff member!!) and just moving here put me into culture shock! Not having a circle of friends to talk with was really difficult. Being with 3 wee kids on my own (DH was away on business for weeks at a time) was nearly the end of me!!

When summer arrives and I shed my work duties, I’ll be back to my meetups to rub shoulders with like-minded people who don’t mind long-winded conversations and scattered, wandering thoughts. They understand ’cause they’ve experienced the same things. Now if I could just get one of my now adult children to appreciate the marvelous workings of my ADHD mind…….. life would be grand.

Her distain for my brain power does remind me and help me to remember why sometimes people may wish to avoid me. I try to keep my mind focussed on how much I’m talking and how much I’m listening. Like Rick said, ask quesions and then listen. People love to talk, especially about themselves or their kids. (At my age, hearing about other people’s kids can make me gag but maybe that’s because I work with them all day and have zillions of parents telling me all kid’s stories)

Maybe the most important thing to remember is that you’ve not found that perfect friend yet but life is not over yet. Tomorrow may be just the day you’ve been waiting for. BTW, none of my friends had kids even near the age of my children. When you meet your friend, they probably won’t have that ‘birthday guest’ child for kid’s birthday party. Our friends rarely have kids that match up well with our children. Bah!

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