The Forums › Forums › For The Non-ADD › Relationships › Problems with relationship, How do ya'll deal with them? › Re: Problems with relationship, How do ya'll deal with them?
One thing that seems to go along with ADD in a lot of cases, and Patrick spelled it out in their documentary – “you have a problem and we’ll tell you about it”.
“We” tend to be critical – if there’s something wrong, or you do something wrong (we perceive as wrong) we’re going to let you know all about it, often in detail.
So, keep in mind that unless that other person does something REALLY wrong- maybe something risky to health or life, then it might be ok to talk about, but otherwise if it’s a little thing that in the big picture is probably meaningless, drop it, don’t even mention it. Grit your teeth and get over it. Remembering the “Golden Rule” might help. Does anyone really want to be picked apart? If you think you are about to let them know of their mistakes or problems, take a deep breath and really think hard about it, maybe go for a walk or use some distraction (that shouldn’t be hard! HA)
I found that aspect about myself long before any thoughts of ADD when I was going through separation/divorce – that was brought up how I always was critical of how things were done during couple counseling. Now at least I have an explanation, and seem to be more aware of it, and hope to have it under some sort of control.
Patrick described me to a T in that show. I’ll let you know about any problems you have!
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