Re: Successful ADDers annoy the h*ll out of me.

[Anonymous]

Verry interesting post Sdwa.

I too am of the inverted type, I can deal with people, but you will never see me at a networking group or asking for help at the Hardware store. It’S just who I am, regardless of my ADD. Some days, I just wish I didnt have to say a word to anyone, but unfortunatly, life isnt like that and I know I dont have a choice if I want to succeed. I see it as working on myself and not just on dealing with my ADD. Maybe the ADD formed me to be that way growing up, but IT’S not an excuse for me and it has been one hell of a journey to get to where i am now.

Have I had disastrous consequences due to not always taking action on dealing with people, customers, family…you bet, on a weekly basis even. But you got to keep at it.

I guess I am one of the “Fortunate” ones, the “lucky” ones, the “not severe enough to fail” ones. Well I dont buy it! I deal with my ADD on an hourly basis. It’s one hell of a struggle. But I feel every problem has a solution. IT’s not my schpeal, nor a motivational speach, it’s the way I was brought up, the way my father taught me. The same father who never finished highschool, or couldnt stay still for more then 2 mins, who couldnt process his thoughts before acting upon them, but the same father who never gave up, never made an excuse for the way he was, never was afraid to work and who ultimately had to restart from nothing three times before being what is considered successfull by the norm. Obviously he was adha all along without knowing.

I couldnt read all the previous long posts from toofat and billd, I just couldnt, so excuse me if im off topic in regards.

I am in NO way categorizing ADDers, not everyone is able to do what they would like. I never made it through my engineering degree and had to settle for technicien because i couldnbt cope with the system, like many adders, but that made me realize, 9 to 5 jobs suck anyways, they’re not for me, I’m not wired for that, I cant do repetitive stuff without any creativity or room for it. Why dwell in trying to be an engineer when i may be more suited for something else. Finding that something else was another ordeal.

I finally started my own business with the help of non-profit organizations that gave legal and business coaching, already I was looking for help, to delegate, because i knew there are things i simply cant do. And this is 5 years before even knowing what add is and being diagnosed.

I have been able to succeed well so far, but do I do my own accounting….hell no! I delegate, especially what I suck at . Just like I have someone to help me through with dealing with staff. Does it cost me more sometimes? yes. But it’s the price to pay for someone like me….like us. I’m a shitty boss, unable to say what i know should be said, and I am still working on that, and thats why I have someone assist me for that, I suck at it, but being add does not prevent me for finding a solution and/or someone, even if it may take forever to get it done!

Have I had problems and horrifying situations due to lack of proper time management, lack of communication, and for reasons directly linked to my ADD, you bet. There are mistakes i regret alot, but I live with it, and try not to do them again even if sometimes i still do.

All in all, people see me as successfull, i work for myself, have over a dozen employees, and should be on top of the world. BUT, ask me if I am successfull and i will say no. I dont feel that way, i have alot of regrets, alot of issues about how i am that bothers me and even my confidence. People say I’m to modest, I just dont see what they see, dont feel the same. I know what i feel when my brain says to do this and i do that instead knowing the concequeneces ahead. I know what it feels to not be well and not enjoy life.

TRUE SUCCESS IS WHAT HAPPENS WITHIN! not your income, not your title.

ADD has not made me successfull, and it hasent helped either. IT’S a burden, for all of us. It hasent made me any more smart or stupid and it is just shit. I hate it. But till I have blood in my vains, I will not make it an excuse and will live my life as I can, through success or failure.

Besides, for every success, there are always a bunch of failures behind, it is true for normal people, and even more for us.

P.S.: I am sorry if this offends any and is in no way ment to push the envelope on the original post nor is it to brag about myself, people who know me know that is the furthest of who i am.

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