Re: What to do for my next job… I need help!!

[Rick Green – Founder of TotallyADD]

A couple of thoughts–The owners of the business have a huge stake in making it work. They’re probably terrified with the current state of the economy. Maybe they have kids or big debt, maybe this store is their life dream, who knows. But the best way to get positive feedback and acknowledgement is to offer it. Become the source of it. See if you can find something to either compliment, acknowledge or praise them for. It may be something as simple as, “You really love this store, don’t you.” Or it may be something like, “I can tell you’re stressed. This store means a lot to you, doesn’t it?” And let them talk. I know you may not be in the mood to do this, but it’s where real power lies.

Get into their world for a while. Hear what’s going on for them. Or imagine what it must be like for them.

Then imagine if you were them, what would you want in an employee?

Can you be that?

Whether you stay at this job or move on, this is an incredibly valuable practice.

For example, when we bought our cottage way back when we loved going out in the boats. A dozen or more times a day. And EVERY time my mom would say, “Make sure you have life jackets, bailing cans and paddles.” Every time. A dozen times a day. Day after day. Year after year. When I had kids of my own she still said it. It drove me crazy. I thought, “She doesn’t trust me. What does she think I am? She can’t even drive a boat, why is she nagging me?” I actually stopped going up to the cottage very much because her nagging drove me crazy. Then breakthrough came when I was in a course and I told this story, with lots of detail, and the woman leading the course asked, “Why do you think she does that? Why does she say that?” And I realized… She loves me. She can’t drive a boat. She can’t swim well. If we got into trouble she couldn’t come and help… And if anything happened to us it would break her heart.

Next time your boss is ranting about something, or your spouse is ranting about something, or your kids are off on a rant, or perhaps even when you are on a rant, consider why.

In fact, what I hear from your rant ‘Tinasha’ is that you want to stay at this store, you want to make it work, you want to be acknowledged and you want to be able to contribute your creativity. If that’s true, maybe you should be telling the people who own the store exactly that.

Right now, they may just think you’re an employee who’s lazy, stupid or deliberately sabotaging things.

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