Reply To: Being diagnosed as a child doesn't make life a cake walk

[moses]

I was diagnosed when I was six years old. Kinda early I think. I was on meds for a number of years, when I hit grade 10 I stopped taking pills, and decided to try and live WITH my add, not against it. It’s helped, and it’s been a wiled ride.

It all started when I decided to learn about the medications I was on, and made the choice that they were in fact not helping me at all, rather they were designed to slow down the accurance of flipflop bainwaves, ie jumping from one thing to another. that was all fine and dandy rather I also learned that I wasn’t as smart As I was supposed to be for my age because my brain couldn’t perform the way it was initially designed to perform. I had an average IQ. about 105. It upset me because that couldn’t explain why I had incredible Ideas every once in a while that were way beyond me. So i figured my brain was trying to tell me that it had a higher capacity than was being allowed. So I stopped for that sole reason. self-experimentation.

It has been a very difficult journey, but after almost ten years, My IQ has gone from an averageish 105 to around 135-140. Thats great, however I still have All the bouts that addders have, and have learned to live with them, and accept them. It has helped my personal growth enormously when dealing with acceptance of the self and others, patience, and general understanding of others. I can almost have a full conversation with someone without zoning out onto a different topic altogether, although it has literally taken years just to train my brain to stay on topic, which is still damn difficult. sleeping habits on the other hand are my worst enemy and I might never control them. ie up till 5 am, bed at midnight next day, up at noon day after, bed at midnight. its insanity. I suffered from ultra low esteem when i was younger cuz i just thought i was less than everyone else due to my condition. i grew up out of town which was very solitary, it helped though cuz i had less distractions. I have adhd, and HAD tourettes, but through years. and i mean YEARS, I have slowly learned to control my ticks and outbursts with copious ammounts of excersize, diet, and acceptance that if i don’t give into the tick as i used to, it will eventually subside. the worst part is feeling the tick comming on a few moments of it happening, the build up of unused energy coursing through my viens and muscles.. GOTTA MOVE.. NOOOWWW (kicks over lampshade, knocks coffe to floor, punches desk for spilling coffe0 and breaking lampshade BOOM my fists hurt from punching the desk) F***!!! I did it again….. not so much anymore. still happens tho. especially when im tired. but like I was saying tho, over the years I’ve learned one thing when dealing with information overload and the tempation to do something else thats more interesting. Always have at least five or six things on the go at once. I know its crazy, but if you try and do more than five things at once, youll get bored and switch to the next thing. eventually you’ll rotate and get everything you needed to do accomplished. Thats the only way I can do it. like utra x-treme multitasking for the expert adder u know? but always make sure you try and finnish them near the same time, that way you really see EXACTLY what you accomplished all at once. It makes a big statement unto yourself. instead of puttering around doing one thing, then the next, then the next. your bulldozing everything simultaneously whislt evil laughing and singing supercalifragilisticexpialidicious. yar. also a good thing to do, is look back at your accomplishments, like the major ones, over the course of your life and ask this simple question; out of my day to day, how many people do I actually know personally who have accomplished as much as I have? and really put the thought into it too. you’ll be amazed. for instance. I still loaf about as if I’ve never done anything, no accomplishments to speak of. but when i think about it. I used to be obese, like rly big. now im 155 pounds, and keeping it off. for almost four whole years. ive donated almost 2000 hours to community services and volenteer work. ive painted a few amazing pieces of artwork without even knowing beforehand that i could infact paint. I delivered one of the most memorable speeches my entire family has ever heard,(very very big family over 2 countries), at my grandfathers funeral. it was a funeral yes. but someone had to say SOMETHING. it was a half hour speech. And I surprised myself as much as anybody else. I have been the inspiration for a book written by one of my friends, even tho he only published 150 copies, still pretty cool. I can longboard. swim. run. read at over 500 worlds a minute, type at 300+ if i disregard gramar and sound.. the list goes on. what I’m trying to say is this. that even tho sometimes you have large bouts of low self-esteem, all you need to do is recount all the awesome things you’ve part taken in your lifetime, it just takes some time to remember. even the small things, and even if you’ve made a fool of yourself, did people experience joy because of it? ergo because of you?. I bet your a hell of a lot more awesome than you give yourself credit so just stay excellent to people. your positive self esteem will start to protrude out of your many orafaces before you know it 🙂

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