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@Doublel, your trail of “just one more thing…” is so familiar!
It used to drive me nuts that time keeps getting away from me, and I don’t even feel it passing, unless someone tells me, or I set an alarm.
Now, I know that we ADDers have trouble with abstract concepts—and “time” in the human world is a man-made abstract bunch of measurements. No wonder we can’t feel time passing, or estimate how long it’ll take to do something!
Even though I now understand why I have trouble with time-perception, I still have to set a series of alarms, and carefully back-plan all the steps to get somewhere or do something, to figure out how long it’ll take. And make a schedule and force myself to stick to it.
But I still screw this up sometimes (like, today), but not as often.
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“It makes me feel like a kid when my dh reminds me…”
That happens a lot in ADHD “mixed marriages”.
The non-ADHD partner feels like they need to take responsibility for everything, or it won’t get done. To the ADHD partner, this feels like “He (or she) thinks I’m a kid!” A marriage is supposed to be an equal partnership, so if it turns into a “parent and child” dynamic, there’s going to be resentment in both partners.
It’s one of the things in Melissa Orlov’s book “The ADHD Effect on Marriage”. And communication is a big part of it.
It also helps if you can laugh about the things that frustrate you.
Have you seen “ADD…And Loving It?”—the documentary that led to TotallyADD? (http://totallyaddshop.com/products/add-loving-it#.UkSbMBe9KK0)
It has some lovely moments, when Patrick McKenna (who has ADHD) and his wife (who doesn’t) talk about their marriage. They love that ADHD means life is never dull, and that it gives them so much to laugh about…if not in the moment, then later on.
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