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October 11, 2014 at 10:09 pm #126137
After another long night of ridiculing myself, I had another one of my “epiphanies.”
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I have read many articles on how some ADDers become people pleasers to compensate for the societal “norms” they seemingly don’t comply to. Or at least, that’s the way it was for me.
I have spent so long trying to sift through what was me and what wasn’t me because I’ve always been trying to mask my true self in the company of others. I’ve always felt like there was something I wasn’t saying, even though I desperately wanted to. It is a constant source of pain and fear for me, to try to hide who I truly am.
And so, after being suffocated by the pain and the fear for probably the millionth time, I came to realize it’s just not worth it.
It is not worth forcing oneself into suffering for the sake of others’ opinions. Why should we, when the general mass of people are just passers-by in our lives, while we are the ones living it? Is the praise of just one person, whom you may never see in the next chapter of your life, worth the constant suffocation of the one person who will never go away, yourself?
I definitely don’t think so.
And by the end of the night, I came to accept that I am indeed worth it. My life, just like everyone else’s, is worth existing without any oppression or fear. My life is worth living, as is, without someone else telling me how to be.
We just shouldn’t need the world to love us,
the world should need us to love ourselves.October 15, 2014 at 9:42 am #126148@robynshnobyn – one of the things I was taught somewhere along the line is that if someone doesn’t like me for who I am then that is their problem not mine. When we choose to associate with the people who appreciate us for all that we are, and accept what we aren’t is when we can be comfortable in our own skin.
I am a notorious people pleaser, but I now apply that to the people in my life who appreciate it. You are definitely worth it, every one is. As long as you say, and do things that make you comfortable and make you happy, then that is ultimately all that matters.
Create a great day!
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