Caregiver Depression

[staci_face]

I am tired. Just exhausted. My daughter THANK GOD is doing great this past month! Therapy, Meds, Health, Karate, Scouts, Neighborhood friends – ALL GOOD!

If nothing is wrong why do I feel so bad?

I think I have caregiver fatigue! I am so proud of my kid, she’s been so happy, smiling, giggling – but I still have Mommy guilt. Ugh – Sorry, just ranting and hoping someone has something inspiring to say to me. I just have such a bad case of the Mommy Blahs lately.

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[kc5jck]

Perhaps you’ve been too busy until now to have the time to feel bad. Go get one of those things they put champagne in with the ice and ice down a bunch of KitKat Bars in it. Then fill the tub with a hot bubble bath. Let us know if that works for you. Actually, a bit of champagne as well would probably not hurt.

Oh, don’t forget the candles.

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[Anonymous]

What are you feeling blue about Staci??? Specifically…..

Toofat

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[staci_face]

Overwhelmed I think – Waiting for the hammer to fall.

It is a full time job just keeping my daughter on an even Keel. So many extra activities (Therapy Monday, Scouts Wed, Karate thurs, fri and sat). Plus the challenges of school for her HW takes so long, then she wants to play and run and do…. And the shower every night 40 minutes just to get her in, 40 minutes to get her out. PLUS I have a house to manage, people to feed, full time job, and occasionally I like to pretend I have a life too…..

Im just exhausted. But shes doing the best she ever has been. Meds are working, therapy is helping – Chugg along chug along chug along – I think I just need to recharge my batteries.

((I sound like a horrible whiner))

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[Anonymous]

Wow, that’s a full agenda alright. Seems like the shower is a time consuming issue and daily…..40 minutes to get in a shower??? Another 40 minutes to get out…what is with that???? How old is your daughter???

Toofat

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[staci_face]

Sorry for the delay. I took was sick and I think that that may have been part of my WHINEY state for the past 2-3 weeks. Maybe not so much depressed but SICK!!!!

My daughter is 10. She fights constantly about showering, then once in the shower – its next to impossible to get her out until the hot water has run out, which usually means she a-forgot to wash hair, b-put tons of shampoo in hair and now has not hot water to wash it out.

Report Cards came out and she got all B’s one b+ and and a-. I am a very proud mommy.

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[Tiddler]

Hiya

I used to stay in the shower for too long and get out with soap still on my hair. I also used to step in with my bra still on as I had taken years trying to remember to take everything off then suddenly there was an extra thing to remember!

I didn’t spend ages fussing about getting in, though my son does about his bath. He will bath though but won’t shower. Have you tried trying a bath?

Sounds like she’s doing fantastically well. Congratulations to her and you. I hope you’re feeling better now by the way. I get worn out and snappy when I’m ill. And cry a lot!

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[Saffron]

Staci, I have one of these kids too, and can relate completely. Two things:

First, you are doing a *fabulous* job by the sounds of it. YAY you, Mom.

Secondly, as we both know, exhaustion, guilt and feelings that you’re not doing enough all go with the territory. I think this just has to do with the relentlessly demanding, constant nature of parenting high-maintenance kids.

I mean, with my other child, I’ve enjoyed an ever-increasing break from relentless troubleshooting since she left toddlerhood. But with my child who has ADHD, it’s as if toddlerhood never ended.

To find the energy to go on, I find I have to:

(1) look back at how far he’s come and the milestones he’s reached with my help (which have usually been too gradual and I’ve usually been too tired to notice)

(2) always tell myself that the constant work on his behalf is an investment in his future, and won’t last forever!

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[staci_face]

Thank you all for your words of encouragement and for the much needed understanding pat on the back.

I have re-read your responses to me to many times to count the past few days.

Thank you

thank you

thank you

PS: Tried bath, I replastered the dounstairs bathroom ceiling 2X already – shes a “splasher” and yes we do baths occasionally still but same problem – fight for a while to get in, then can barley get her out – PLUS THE SPLASHING!!! LOL

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