From Relief to Reality…

[Anonymous]

Ive struggled my whole life on and off medication for depression and anxiety. All the while I believed depression wasn’t the problem it was the result, Something else had to be causing it. In May of this year I hit another emotional bottom and found the cause…ADHD.

I held off on learning anything about ADHD because I wanted an “Official Assessment” first. I don’t recommend anyone does tha, there was no sense waiting, the information has been so valuablet. I was taking medication which does help A LOT, but I had some alarming side affects so I switched Medication, and it was time to learn about what I’m dealing with.

What a relief! I could not believe how many of my challenges throughout my entire life were attributed to this illness. I was so excited. I started thinking I may actually be capable of having a healthy lasting relationship and a successful rewarding career. I started to make small changes to improve my organization at work, I made an appointment with a counselor to coach me in time management, and organization and I started on my journey to success!

I was on cloud nine and I fell off…

A couple days ago I came to the realization that even though I know what the problem is now and I can accept myself and focus on what I need to be successful, doesn’t mean my Boss will be as accepting. I’m about to lose my job. My anxiety and depression are at an all time high and I have had to take a couple days off work to collect myself.

My work environment is not ADD friendly. I wont get in to the details but I’m at the point now where I’m pretty sure I’m going to lose my job whether I come clean and tell him what Ive been dealing with or I don’t. The way I see it is that if I speak up at least I’m accepting who I am and my limitations, I’ll ask for what I need to be successful and if he isn’t willing to work with me then I didn’ fail because I wasn’t capable but rather the environment is not suitable to my success.

I’m both relieved and afraid. I’m relieved not to hide my inadequacies anymore, that’s a big relief. Now that I know what the problem is, I no longer think it’s me. But Ive had 3 jobs in this field the first one I left after my second LOA for depression and anxiety, The last one they fired me, and this one well I see the pattern. I just have no idea what type of work I’ll do? I don’t even know what I want to do???

I’m going to get a Psychological Assessment done. I hope it will reveal some of my strengths and challenges more clearly so I can gain some perspective in to where I’ll be happy and successful.

I’m new on this site and really looking forward to connecting with others facing the same challenges. It’s so helpful to know I’m not alone and there are people who understand

Thanks for your support,

Tanya

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

I’m so sorry. I can relate to your feelings!

I’m relieved, and I’m working on accepting myself, but I’m not really seeing others being so accepting and starting to think it’s too much to expect.

I wish you all the best and hope things are looking up!

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

Hi Tanya

I’m in the Automotive Industry have been for 15 years. Let me tell you I can relate not that I’m not good at he core idea of my Industry but learning about my ADHD and being on this Journey has really awaken who I am and how to harness this Disease so it actually shuttles me forward. There are always bumps and bruises along the way…that what we call life. I appreciated reading your Blog and look forward to hearing more of your journey as time goes on

Cheers

REPORT ABUSE

[Anonymous]

Talk to your boss. There are things that you can do to over come AD/HD challenges at work. Strangely I’m dealing with some of those things here as I’ve just started down this road myself, the irony was this “Unfortunately, you’ll appear more transparent than you realize and others will wonder why you’re pretending that all is well. You don’t have to tell your whole story, but it’s helpful to, at least, acknowledge your dilemma.” I read horoscopes like I read the cartoons, but this today, resonated in my mind and when I read your post I felt like I (as an AD/HD Leo) needed to share it.

Identify the challenges, how you can over come them, what/who you need to make it happen, and put the plan into place. The worse thing that can happen is that they fire you, but I don’t think they would.

Great luck!!

CMC

REPORT ABUSE

[Author]

Posts