There are multiple times where I get frustrated with myself and I hate myself cause of it. For example, someone will ask me to do something for them and I will just completely forget and they get upset with me. Another example is being annoying to family and close friends but after I do the action, I realize it was stupid and it was in fact annoying. But for the split second in my mind, I choose to do it without even thinking. I also get frustrated with school work because I will be doing homework and ill get distracted or I will be studying and get distracted. There were a couple times where I would get so upset with myself I would start to cry and hate myself because of the ADD. I don’t wanna be this way. Even with my medication, it could still be hard. I know now that I have to embrace it and have to work harder to control it but I still find myself wondering why I’m like this and wanting to be “normal”. I felt like sharing this because I want to hear other peoples stories and perspectives on this. Thank you.somethingaboutmaryParticipant
You’re definitely not alone in this. I feel that my (undiagnosed) ADHD has caused similar distress. I tend to be overly harsh and critical of myself when I know I’m procrastinating or forgetful. Right now, I’m supposed to be finishing and submitting a final paper but here I am on this forum…
I think it is important to learn to be compassionate towards yourself. In other words, you should try to forgive yourself for making mistakes. I think it is harmful when we focus on our shortcomings and ‘failures’ but the fact that you care and are trying hard says more about yourself than your mistakes do.
I understand the frustration may actually come from the external pressures to perform like “normal” people – as ALL people feel this pressure. I’m definitely not an expert but our frustration is expected… since we all feel the need to meet the standards imposed by society. Regardless of where we come from, what gender we are, etc., not meeting these standards may result in judgment from others – like our parents, peers, other family members, strangers… Just remember that nobody is perfect and we are all trying to fit into a role that we believe we should. Not to say that we all have the same experience, but our unique circumstances create the unique people we are and will become…
It’s inspiring to see that you care a great deal about tackling your ADHD. Have you explored other treatments alternative to medication? Recently, I’ve been trying meditation. I’ve also heard that physical activity really helps… which is definitely something I need more of.
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