Internet vs. Clock: Round 20,345 — Tips??

[dithl]

…”DING-DING! And the winner, once again, is INTERNET!”

Any tips on how to break away from the computer? I sat down to do one thing, told myself to take only 1/2 hour. It has been 3 hours. I did many, many things.

It’s one thing to waste my own free time. But I feel that there are other things I could be doing and that I’m setting a absolutely rotten example for my children. (I am SOOOO glad that smart phones did not exist when they were toddlers!) And now that I’m back at work, wasted time on the internet can start that whole negative spiral of falling behind, catching up, too many hours at work, burn-out, miserable me….

I’ve tried a couple of online blocking programs (to limit the amount of time on certain sites) and timers.

@Larynxa talked about the fact that we pay attention to what is interesting, not important. So what can I set up in my environment that is more interesting than this sparkly, colourful internet thing? (I do have to use it for work, so disabling the wi-fi is not a solution). Turn the cat into a Teletubby? (“Oooh, What dat?”)

Seriously, would really appreciate some collective wisdom on this one….

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[jojosephine]

I don’t have any good tips. I do the same..please people do share.

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[Wgreen]

I posted about Twitter just the other day. The Internet in general is just as insidious. Our friend Larynxa likes to say that an ADD mind is an interest-driven mind. Though I think that’s generally an unfortunate thing (it’s a sign of narcissism—we are constantly focused on our own likes/interests/thoughts, often at the expense of being insensitive to the needs of others and unavailable for ideas and tasks we don’t find personally compelling), I certainly think she’s right. The Web fuels the impulsions of a wandering, interest-driven mind ad absurdum.

I don’t know what the answer is. You can hardly afford to throw your computer or tablet away—they have become essential devices in the modern world. Still, it’s like being forced to sleep in the same bed with somebody you find irresistibly attractive but know you need to avoid.

I suppose you do the best you can—resolve to limit your browsing to just an hour or two a day? Good luck with that.

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[blackdog]

Only 3 hours?

I recently started using the timer trick on the advice of a friend. It helps to keep me stay focused when I am doing things like housework. Just knowing that I am going to spend 10 minutes washing dishes, then 10 minutes cleaning the counters and stove, then 10 minutes cleaning the fridge, etc., helps me to not feel too bogged down and start wanting to take a break. Because once I sit down to take a break, and I pick up the iPad, just to check my email…..that’s the end of the housework for the day. And setting the timer to limit my time online does not work. Not at all.

The only real advice I can think of is stay away from the Internet until you have done everything else you need to do for the day.

 

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[wanderquest]

I used to have an alarm set daily on my Outlook calendar and would just hit snooze 15 min on it all day long with the intention of snapping myself out of the internet or whatever rabbit hole I went down. Wound up not really working because I’d just click the reminder again and just keep on doing whatever. That was pre-diagnosis and medicine. Actually I might give that another whirl now. One of my “traps” for myself.

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[wanderquest]

And not that it makes you feel better, but I went into my home office last night with the intention of sending ONE e-mail to my kid’s teacher. Spent two hours photoshopping pictures from Easter. Didn’t ever send the e-mail.

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[kc5jck]

This may be a hyperfocus issue, see http://totallyaddconnect.com/forums/topic/how-do-i-come-out-of-a-hyper-focus-episode/

Link to other thread I referenced: http://totallyaddconnect.com/forums/topic/what-does-alcohol-do-to-you/

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[dithl]

I do so love you people.

@blackdog: only 3 hours – this time. Ya, I do try to stay away from internet til I’ve done other stuff…today the first thing on my to-do list involved printing off an email…
@Wgreen: Yep, I came on here to ask this question specifically, then saw your Twitter post.The other thing about Twitter…for those of who don’t blurt out because we are too busy trying to figure out what to say until it’s too late…it’s so time-consuming – not only do you have to figure out what exact message you want to get across, but then you have to edit it down to 120 characters without losing the tone…
@wanderquest: It *does* make me feel better 🙂

Maybe if I can come up with a “universal rule” that I can make stick. My morning rule works (mostly) — I am allowed up to 3 hits on the snooze bar, but then I have to get up. It works because my better half asked for it. It’s a simple limit, it’s more than fair, and it is *for* someone special.

So…I just have to translate a similar rule to this problem. After all, sleep and internet have about equal pull on me. If I can do it for sleep, I can do it for this. Love the ideas and commiseration, thanks for letting me “talk this through”…still no there but feel a little closer.

@kc5jck: Thanks for the links, I did a quick check for this issue in the “Strategies for Work” section but didn’t think to dig elsewhere. Ya, I hyperfocus on other things too. Makes getting away from work at a decent hour difficult. It’s good to remember that Adderall can exacerbate it. It was a problem before I got diagnosed and on meds, but something to monitor.

Now, about your second link….kit-kats and tequila in the freezer would work better than a Teletubby cat? Hmmm, I don’t know. No way of testing it though – I just gave up sugar for awhile…and 5 out of 8 people in my immediate family have alcohol addiction. I’m one of the lucky 3 who haven’t had any issues with alcohol. I think it’s pure luck, but still want to keep it that way 😉 (Though I do wonder sometimes about the distinction between hyperfocus and addictive behaviour.) Oh ya — and it’s probably highly unethical to surgically insert an iphone into the cat’s belly, so we wouldn’t be able to compare the two methods.

The more I talk, the more I am dooming myself to be the crazy cat lady.

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[wanderquest]

That reminds me, I saw a story a while back where they figured out that just the taste of beer was enough to release dopamine. BINGO.

http://psychcentral.com/news/2013/04/21/just-a-taste-of-beer-releases-dopamine/53954.html

I may drink too much. But not all the time and sometimes I go months without anything so I figure that’s not really addiction. So far. I have asked a couple of people close to me to keep vigil due to family history.

Maybe this should have posted this in the alcohol thread, but nobody has posted in there for over a year and a half.

 

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[blackdog]

@dithl– I actually typed several versions of that post before hitting submit, each with different ideas. But the only one I could think of that might actually work was the avoidance.  Some sort of reward system might be a good idea. Like after half an hour of Internet time if you stop you get a treat of some sort, whether it’s tequila and kit kat or a gold star or ……anything but surgically implanting an iPhone in your cat.  Don’t go there.

I am amazed that you manage to limit your snoozes to 3. And you might be on to something there. If the rule is important to someone else you find it easier to stick to. So making limiting your Internet time a rule to allow you to spend more time with your kids, for example, might be a strong motivator for you.

Interesting that you mention those of us who are too busy trying to figure out what we want to say until it’s too late. You wouldn’t believe the amount of time that costs me. Well, maybe you would. I once made myself late for work because I was replying to someone in a forum and spent half an hour composing and editing and composing again without even realizing it. Which led to a new rule: No forums before work.

@waderquest- Good call having your friends look out for you like that. It’s very easy to lose control and not know it yourself.

Strangely, I have never had any addiction issues. Don’t know how I dogged that bullet. But extreme social isolation combined with lack of resources probably helped.

 

And now it’s time for bed….just have to turn the iPad off….really am very sleepy now…maybe I’ll just read a few other threads first……

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[franklin]

This problem tortures me, and I still lose many hours a day on one distraction or another, sometimes on the internet, but often just fiddling with settings, trying to automate something (I’m a geek), etc. I’ve only marginally improved things at work despite timers, lists, plans, meds, and even Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, but home has improved a lot more.

At home, getting lost on the web all the time seriously hurt my family. Two solutions that work well for me are:

1. Parental controls. They are built-in to the Mac; on PC you may need to purchase parental control software — be sure it can enforce time limits. I choose to be limited to 2 hours a day max, starting at 10 am, turning off at 10 pm. The morning start time is to prevent me from “just checking” something on my way out the door to work. I know you know what I mean. The evening curfew is to give me at least the possibility of getting myself to bed before midnight (or 1, or 2…) and also to have time with my spouse. (Hint: it’s worth it. And I don’t mean nookie, although that’s nice; we have a lot more emotional intimacy now.)

My wife has the password. It annoys her a lot when I ask her to extend my time for a “legitimate” reason, i.e. working on taxes, but she’s learned to ignore my begging and just calmly tells me I can finish it tomorrow (unless it’s really true that it has to be done then — and she is rational enough to judge what’s important, not my obsessed ADD brain!) Her valid point is that if it was so important, I could have done it at the beginning of the two hours… hmmm, what a concept!

Some people I know avoid the marital costs of being in a “child/parent” role with spouse by having a non-family friend keep the password. And, that makes it even harder to talk your way into more time online, since they’re not right there in the room with you.

Once I’m away from the screen for about five minutes I find that I’m grateful to be out of its grip, the “super-important” thing I was doing suddenly seems much less urgent, and it always turns out fine that I let it go till the next day… or don’t do it at all because it was actually a waste of time (like researching the ABSOLUTE BEST price on a $20 item, for hours… Sound familiar, anyone?) The panic and desperation as the computer counts down the last seconds before it logs me off is excruciating, as I frantically try to finish typing something and hit Send, or whatever. Amazingly, I haven’t died yet, and a few minutes later it really is OK. Even though that didn’t seem possible while it was ticking down…

2. No smartphone. Face it — I can’t control myself once I get going. I have discovered that:

a) I don’t actually need to check email / news / weather every 10 minutes. Unbelievable, isn’t it? At this point, anyone who emails me regularly now knows that I won’t necessarily answer till the next day. I politely ask them to call or text me if it’s urgent (remember the olden days?)

b) It really isn’t important to Google that interesting thing that just came up  in conversation. When I used to do that I was immediately checked-out of the conversation, and often I never got back. Not good for relationships — and we all need connections!

Essentially, my advice is: unplug yourself from the computer in ways you can’t circumvent. Lock down the computer. Toss the smartphone. I am so much happier now with a dumb phone that only does calls, texts, and calendar. (BTW, the phone calendar is essential for me. My motto: “If it isn’t written down, it doesn’t exist.” The phone calendar syncs with my work calendar, so I can add an item either place and a reminder will beep on my phone. More on that in another post.)

My time management is still a disaster by most people’s standards, but even though “better” is never good enough, it is better!

Good luck, everybody.

–Franklin

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[angelicdemon]

Oh the evils of the internet,lol.

I would have to say the longest I was stuck to the computer and using internet was for 16hrs straight.It was because of a new online game i was playing,lol.I was in high school so yeah I was dead tired during all my classes.

How I’ve learned to break away from the internet is not having anyone to talk to,cant think of anything to look up,cant stand to sit anymore and my body screaming at me to move,and my OCD that came along with my adhd med,lol.

If I sit to long like over 1-2hrs with out moving really my legs start to hurt and it forces me to want to move.

Then also I cant stand if i feel the floors r dirty or the sink is full where u cant use it so then i’ll do the dishes.

I hope anything i said here could help.

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[Rick Green – Founder of TotallyADD]

Some interesting ideas here.

I’ve found timers help… for a while. Then I get used to the sound and tune it out.

But that’s okay. That’s ADHD right? Novelty. So if a dollar store kitchen timer works for two months, hey, that’s fine. And when I get used to it and it rings and I’m oblivious, I don’t throw it out, I just replace it with something else. And down the road I know that the first timer will be fresh again.

The timer on my iPhone, in the clock section, has an alarm sound called Time Passage. And it just keeps playing it until I stop it. It’s a wonky, goofy, slightly annoying ‘tick-tock’ song. And it cuts through anything and grabs my attention. Anything that just goes Ding, Twang, Boink, or Buzz once or twice isn’t sustained enough to hold me attention.

One other suggestion. Move the computer to a higher table, so you have to stand to use it. It’s much better than sitting. And harder to do for 3 hours without noticing.

You want it to be ergonomic, but if it’s cozy and comfy, it’s just too easy to get lost…

 

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[sar316]

On my Mac I have one called time out. It covers your screen at a time you predetermine to remind you to take a break. Another I really like is called self control. This one locks you out of predetermined web pages for a predetermined amount of time so that I can work on my paper for 3 hours instead of random internet.

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[meltruett]

@blackdog  Thank you for that tip regarding 10 mins per task! I’m constantly setting a timer to force me to spend 30 min to an hour to get a chunk of a major project done.  This doesn’t always work if I don’t feel like focusing for that long. Instead I’m going to try breaking up each task spending ten minutes on each of the necessary steps for the outcome.

 

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