The Forums Forums Emotional Journey I'm Angry King Minus: Everything I Touch Goes Missing!!! (vent)

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  • quizzical


    I am SO SICK of things just DISSOLVING in my grip!

    I arrived at a choir rehearsal with my teenage daughter. As we were getting out of the car, she handed me my iPod.

    As she does, my brain starts splitting in half: “I should keep this in the car/I should take this in with me….” OK, I guess….I’ll take it inside with me…so I’ll put it in my…
    purse? Wait –

    Where the hell is my purse?

    “Did I really drive all the way here without my purse? Did I really, and oh, this just sucks.” I am saying all this out loud to my daughter, but of course I’m not really talking, just thinking out loud, and this new thought has to be processed with excruciating slowness….I have to walk into the building – without my purse, how weird – that must be why the bell keeps going off in my head, right? The one that’s saying This – Feels – Wrong…

    Where did the iPod go? Did I toss it back into the car? Did I put it in my pocket? Did I start to put it in my pocket and just….stop…in the middle of my thought? Is it lying on the ground next to where my car was parked? It’s too long a trip and too late at night to drive back there, it’s too crazy cold outside to search around the floor of the car for more than a couple of minutes. I was wearing at least three items of clothing with pockets and the damn thing’s not in any of them.
    And every time I try to mentally recreate the moment, it just dissolves, along with so many things that I have in my hands.
    Could this be why I sometimes wake up still half-dreaming that I’m holding something (usually a pen), to the point where I can feel it, I can feel my fingers curling around it?
    Ugh, ugh, arghhhhhhhh……
    This will be the second of my two iPods that I have lost on the ground somewhere. And that’s not counting all the other times I’ve dropped it/left it/put it somewhere crazy stupid and then managed to recover it.


    I love the title of this post. It’s absolutely poetic.


    I love the title too. It’s just so perfect. Your post gave me a good laugh too. Though not the part where you actually lost your iPod. Sorry about that, hope it turns up. But I can’t help but laugh at the rest of it because it’s like it was a page torn right out of one of my 101 notebooks that are around here somewhere. If you’re the King then I must be the court jester. 😉

    Patte Rosebank

    King Minus…

    That brings back memories…


    Ha Ha Larynxa. I don’t remember that one. But from this perspective it takes on a whole new meaning.

    Today I made my rubber gloves and cleaner disappear several times. And the case I keep my pens in. I have the pens though. Not really sure how I managed to make the case disappear but not the pens.

    That’s all I can think of for today. Fortunately I don’t often make valuable items vanish. Though I have done it often enough.


    Awesome link, Larynxa – my subconscious must have been at work when I titled my post; I thought maybe I’d come up with that idea myself but when I watched the cartoon I recognized it – a fact which shows my age, I’m sure! Thanks for the blast from the past! 🙂


    @quizzical – you need to read about the Heisenberg uncertainty principle.  It explains why you can’t know both where your stuff is and where it is going to be next with any degree of accuracy.  Just looking at your stuff can make it disappear.  Hence the “it was right here a minute ago” syndrome with which I am sure you are so familiar.

    In short, it’s not your fault, it’s just the quantum mechanical way the world works.  It happend to me last week with one of my posts.  Submit, edit, submit, edit, submit, pffftt . . . gone.


    New here and just wandering through and saw this forum.  I can’t possibly put down all the replies racing through my mind, but I will say there was a time when following Shirley Maclaine’s example, I’d stamp my foot and demand that the spirits “Put It Back”.  Sometimes they actually did. I’d turn around and there the missing object would be just where I’d looked 20 times already. Ha. Ha. Whatever works is my motto.


    Hi @Isdcat, Welcome 🙂

    Ha Ha indeed. I have never tried it exactly that way. But when I start to get really frustrated and start to think “I just need to find the _____!” It often will miraculously appear at that moment. And always in a place I already looked.

    Gremlins. It must be gremlins.


    I actually do that, too…only I ask God. I feel a little silly saying it, but it’s my biggest touchstone with my faith – the thing I ask for and always receive. When I lose some random object, I will stop and – sometimes silently, sometimes not – say, “God, please help me find my [lost item].” And it has not failed me yet…

    I got a new iPod for Christmas, courtesy of my husband.

    Two days after Christmas, an email went out from the choir’s music librarian: She’d been cleaning up the choir room and found a little iPod…Did anyone lose one?

    My gleeful email reply: Me, me, meeeee….

    So now I have TWO iPods.

    Merry Christmas, ADD-style: Late!


    That Guy with ADHD

    I’ve been there too.  I misplaced things all the time.

    It seems as if my brain has already put my keys on the hook before actually physically doing it.  As such it doesn’t really care where it actually puts them.  It recalls the fake memory of the hook and completely forgets the actual physical act of putting them on the kitchen counter.  When the panic sets in my memory recall gets even worse.



    I can’t tell you how often this has happened to me.  Back when PalmPilots were still the rage, I went to the washroom at a stadium (we were watching the Blue Jays at the time, I think).  I got back to my seat and suddenly had that same feeling @quizzical had: This. Feels. Wrong.

    Realized that I’d left my PalmPilot in the stall. Raced back but, just like that automatic door that you see closing, and you rush hard to get to it: it was too late.

    King Minus. Genius. : )

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