My ADDled Brain – Everything Feels Like Work!

[lailamoon786]

(sigh) Why does EVERYTHING feel like work?  Here’s a typical day for me:

Having to get up early = Work
Picking out an outfit = Work
Walking to the bus stop = Work
Trying to clean up my e-mails, office and home = Work
Getting back home from the office = Work
Figuring out what to eat for dinner = Work
Trying to get to bed at a decent time so I can repeat this cycle all … over … again = Work

UGH!!!  Frustrating!!!  Is it just me???

Laila

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[blackdog]

Oh no, it is definitely not just you.

Sometimes figuring out what to eat seems like so much work I just don’t bother. I feel hungry, walk to the fridge and open it, stand there staring at the contents for a few moments, then just shut the door and walk away. Either that or grab whatever happens to be in my line of sight that doesn’t require washing, peeling, chopping, cooking etc.

I only cook dinner because I have other people to feed and even then it’s almost always whatever I decide on at the moment, when they start asking “what’s for dinner?”. I have tried to make meal plans, so that I can budget the grocery money more carefully and cut back on waste, but it never works.

When I first started taking medication my doctor asked me if it was helping and I said I thought it was. Then he said “Well, how do you know? Have you challenged yourself at all?”

It was at that moment that I realized just how little he understands about ADHD.

My first challenge of the day is waking up when my alarm goes off. The next is actually getting out of bed, without hitting snooze 6 times. Then I have to figure out what day of the week it is, if there is a reason I set my alarm for this time, if there is somewhere I need to be…. Then there is showering, brushing my teeth and hair, making coffee, getting something to eat (if I remember to eat), taking my meds (if I remember), remembering if I took my meds or not… etc., etc….By the time I’m done all that, I’m ready to go back to bed again. And my day hasn’t even really begun.

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[gianmaria]

No it is not just you.

£Wanna know my list?

Doing the groceries= work

Calling friends= work

Choosing/buyng a present for an imminent birthday= work

Showing up at dinner/party/bbq= work

Shaving= work

attending your kid’s end of the year play= work

Not to talk about the chores! The funny thing is that it is often ME who brings things up in conversations: “My god, the car is filthy! Oh dear, we still have to install those shelves! Hey, shouldn’t we paste the pictures of Adam’s 5th birthday  in our photo-album? You know, before he goes to college?”

 

On a more serious note.

I remember reading one article about procrastinations which had a brilliant insight, perfectly applicable here: for some people everything should feel good. Which is pretty silly when you think about it. Guess it’s part of having unbalanced brains. It’s like some people have one of those drop counters to keeps them supplied with a regular stream of satisfaction and tranquility so they can go about their days with no problem.

I’m more like a junkie who cannot get his kicks but by doing some special thing, while everything else seems tedious and pointless.

and the minute I say that something “must”, it’s the minute I’m practically writing it off my list of priorities.

On the other hand, we could use this to propel the quest for a more meaningful life.

In the words of Joseph Campbell:
“Your real duty is to go away from the community to find your bliss.

The society is the enemy when it imposes its structures on the individual.
On the dragon there are many scales. Every one of them says “Thou Shalt.”
Kill the dragon “Thou Shalt.”
When one has killed that dragon, one has become The Child.

Breaking out is following your bliss pattern, quitting the old place, starting your hero journey, following your bliss.
You throw off yesterday as the snake sheds its skin.

—
Follow your bliss.
The heroic life is living the individual adventure”

 

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[ramblinon]

I can relate to your junkie comment, always needing something exciting. Again it’s been a few weeks since my diagnosis…now I understand why for my entire life I recall saying this, but mostly living it every week, “I always need something exciting to look forward to do later in the day, week, month.” And I told my doctor that I’ve always had a fear of being bored.

Makes a bit more sense now.

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