Not sure why I meet the criteria as an adult, but "normal" for my childhood….

[Anonymous]

I see all the criteria in me now,as an adult, but looking back on my childhood I was very normal. Shy, but a good student, always had a good friend or two around. We moved a lot so I was always starting over but I was never the class clown, and had decent to good marks.

Now in my mid-40’s I see all the unfinished projects, the inability to sit in my office — I am always pacing, always having more energy to do things all day when other people are ready to do only one thing and then rest. I can not concentrate when people are talking endlessly or saying the same thing over and over. I tune out, do something else, and then have to catch up.

Does anyone else have this experience? Seemingly normal childhood and now seeing (recognizing) symptoms as an adult?

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[Anonymous]

Normal may not have been normal just well managed. Maybe with the moving around you adapted in such a way that you learned to do things in such a way that helped what would of been AD/HD issues. Isn’t the brain a wonderful piece of work lol

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[Anonymous]

You probably had the Inattentive Subtype as a child, more shy quiet and unassuming. However, the symptoms were there but not picked up because you used brute intelligence to get you through.

As life gets more complex, your brain just got overloaded.

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[Anonymous]

One thing you pointed out was that you were always moving. I found that a “fresh start” always prompted my good intentions, so things would start off great due to the novelty of my surroundings, a new teacher, and a determination to do better this time round. Each school year would start off with me doing my homework, writing things in my diary, and concentrating in class. Once the stimulation of novelty wore off then I would revert back to my daydreamy inattentive self. I see the same traits now in my son. Moving around a lot may have hidden many of the symptoms for you. And if you are fairly bright, like my son and I, the school work doesn’t suffer in such an obvious manner except teachers who recognise you are not meeting your potential (which might not have been as noticeable if you changed schools a lot).

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[wawabyjohnah]

I’m thinking the same- normalish childhood with not many symptoms but as an adult it’s a completely different story. I was a shy, quiet kid who was academically talented at primary school. I did, however, notice that I hated any essay/ non practical subject at high school, especially senior high school and on in to university. It frustrated me that I just couldn’t study and no matter how hard I tried I left every assignment to the last minute. I just thought I was just messed up from other issues happening in my life (domestic violence etc) or it was just the way I learnt.

Now as an adult I can’t sit still for long periods (I just came back from a meeting the other day which my manager drove me the 2 hours home. He commented that he was surprised I’d sat still for so long- obviously he’s noticed my restlessness- little did he know how much effort it had taken me to sit still for that long), never finish what I start, have the most disorganised and cluttered desk at work and bedroom at home, was seriously thinking I was getting early dementia because I forget and misplace everything, always late or forget totally about meetings, tune out (even whilst writing this post I’ve been flitting between webpages and forgot where I was up to) etc etc.

Looking back now, I realise that through school and uni there were lots of symptoms that I and no one else ever identified that point to ADHD. I hated uni lectures cause I had to sit still for hours, but overcame that by teaching myself to write with my left hand- which kept me pretty much occupied. I excelled at the practical sides to my subjects but flunked out in written work or long exams. “Would do better with further home study and application” were common comments on reports.

So yesterday I did some research and found I pretty much tick all the boxes for ADHD. Reading through various forums and webpages- a light bulb moment where I saw my life a whole new way. It made so much sense and I realised I wasn’t stupid or lazy or anything else people had told me and that made me cry- happy tears because there was a reason for it all. My next step is to get it confirmed by a doctor and proceed from there (wish it wasn’t the weekend so I could have seen someone straight away- another ADHD trait- hates waiting). So thanks for reading my long post, sorry I sort of hijacked your forum Darlene (and that I talk excessively- another symptom).

Have a great day everyone

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[Anonymous]

Hahaha!! I can soooo relate to teaching yourself to write left handed in your lectures. I did a similar thing – taught myself to write back to front. It drove everyone nuts, because if they borrowed my lecture notes, they would have to read them in a mirror lol!!!

My appointment is in five days time. I had to wait four months to get to this stage. Not easy! I won’t be happy if the psychiatrist I am seeing is not easy to talk to, or too conservative to believe in adult ADHD. Thankfully my GP is fantastic, easy to talk to, and I have her full support, so I don’t feel as worried as I did before I talked to her about my thoughts on possibly having adult ADHD. I know she will help me through the mental trauma of arranging a referral to another psychiatrist. I just wish she could prescribe medication for me, but where I live, adults with ADHD have to be prescribed stimulant medication by a psychiatrist, not a GP, and psychiatrists tend to be a conservative bunch in general (the ones I have met through work certainly are). Grrr!!

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[wolfshades]

wawabyjohnah and KrazyKat: so much of what you both said resonate with me too. As Dr. J. said – sometimes brute intelligence will get you through some schoolwork as a kid, but there are times when you just can’t…quite….get…it…done and those are the times (without a diagnosis) that you think that you’re a failure, or lazy or stupid. I hated doing projects of any kind – from when they were first introduced back in the early grades. Because I knew I couldn’t keep focused. And later on, I did well on exams, but could only study the night before – at which point I was able to go into hyperfocus. That didn’t work with the higher grades though, or where there was memorization involved. I remember Grade 13 as being brutal. One of my favourite subjects was history, but Grade 13 history frustrated me to no end. Instead of learning about events in a story-like way (the way I had learned up until then, which always kept me interested) we were now told we had to memorize everything. I flunked badly, and pretty much got depressed and gave up.

At work, I eventually learned how to “fake it” – either sidestep projects that I knew I’d never complete, or find a way to let things slide. Surprise surprise – most times, people were too busy to call me on it, and so some of the projects will mercifully slip off of the radar. And the guilt – always there was the guilt. When I worked in a factory, I aspired to do a job that would keep me off of the line, but it involved memorization again, and once again, I failed miserably. My boss shook his head and sent me back – and of course the label “stupid” came up. I mean it was a really easy job, punching a series of buttons, but I had to remember sequences and for the life of me, just could not.

What a relief it was to find this place – totallyadd.com – and take the “you might have ADHD” test. It answered so many questions. I also attended a few seminars hosted by Rick Green and Dr. J. – all of which merely confirmed it. Still, I knew the importance of getting a proper diagnosis.

wawabyjohnah: be aware that the process takes a lot of time, and as impatient as you might be, the wait is going to be worth it. It took me about a year before I was diagnosed. And then it took about six months before I started getting treatment (long story there).

Good luck to both of you!

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[wawabyjohnah]

Heya Wolfshades, how are you going?

I have become very aware that the process will take a lot of time. Went to see my doctor the other day. Found out I have to see a adhd psychiatrist to get tested as local GPs can’t do anything here. There is a new one here, just one- in a pretty major rural city. I don’t live in a tiny little town or anything- shows how crappy our health system can be. Anyway, the psychiatrist is private so will probably cost a fortune too. My doc tried to call them to book me in, couldn’t get through, so I have to wait until my next appointment (I have to go back re another medical condition) and see about the referral. No idea how long it will take to get the first appointment. Probably a while…

Since last weekend, when I made my ‘discovery’, I’ve become acutely aware of all the traits I have that can be put under the adhd heading. And all the behaviours that don’t fit too. So second guessing myself- maybe I don’t have it, maybe I am just lazy, stupid etc. Grrr. Driving me nuts. Why isn’t there a simple blood test that the doc can do and get results back the next day?

Yesterday I had a minor crisis at work. My job includes giving out Christmas food hampers and toys to the disadvantaged, and due to a mix up with another department, I had to send out order forms and record who wants a hamper/toys on a spread sheet. Not something I enjoy doing, but I got on with it. I sent the letters out a few weeks ago and have been adding families details as it came in, thinking I was doing really well. That was until the master spreadsheet came out Thursday. Discovered a few of my families were missing off the list. Thursday was the last day to send data down to be added to the master sheet, so I raced around last thing to get it there, for the third time I might add. I’d been out all day doing other things and I had 15 minutes before the end of work. Get into work Friday morning and find that my data was still missing, chased and called around for hours trying to get it fixed. I was getting extrememly frustrated that no one could help me or tell me why these families were missing. Finally, my regional manager then tells me that I hadn’t ordered hampers for these families at all, I said I did, he said I hadn’t put the numbers in the row for hampers and that’s why the families weren’t on the master sheet. Aarrgghhh. Looked through my local spread sheet and found out I hadn’t entered that data for over half of my families. I entered toys but not hampers. Arrggghhh again. Now I was not only frustrated because no one told me I’d missed filling in an entire column for nearly 50 families, but sooooo pissed off with myself because I had double and triple checked the data so my families didn’t miss out. My manager did get a few families added to the list, I don’t even think I thanked him- I was in total disbelief that I could be so stupid. I sat in silence on the phone to him for a bit, mainly because if I said anything it was not going to be pleasant, and I was also contemplating what I had done and what to do about it, then I told my manager that’s why I don’t do data entry, I miss important details. He chuckled at that (is that good or bad???)

I really wish I had a diagnosis, because I’d like to talk to my manager about how it affects my work, but have no proof that adhd exists…yet. He’s pretty cool really and I think he’d be ok with it. The organisation I work for is pretty good too. I meet my targets and perform well, so it’s not something that affects my work, well at least in managements eyes (thank goodness I work on my own and they don’t see the craziness that exists in my world). It would also help explain my stuff up with the hampers because I don’t want them thinking I am stupid when I know I am not.

Hmm, there’s my little rant for the week. Thanks for reading.

Johnah

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