OK .. gonna let it all hang out here …

[Lindstr7]

Good suggestions Curly, maybe some time away might give her the space she needs and the time to appreciate what she values in him as a mate. I agree that he should clean up after himself, but not only his mess….why not show that he can clean up, period, without making the separation between his and hers. That would show that he understands what SHE has been doing all these years and allow him to acknowledge and value her contributions.

Not to be harsh, but am I detecting a note of defensiveness in Rich’s posts with regard to her not accepting his efforts? For me, the hardest thing was acknowledging MY role in the demise of my marriage. Once I was forced to go out on my own, I was better able to understand my ex’s position and let go of my defensive posturing, suck it up and acknowledge that it was mostly my fault (or to be fair to myself, my ADD). In any case. I hope it works out for you Rich and we’ll see posts of your continuing progress. This ADD thing has destroyed too many lives and marriages.

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[Anonymous]

OK .. I went to the VA doc today and got a script for 5mg destroamphetamine. I took one at 1ish today and while I didnt feel anything profound, I felt able to see what was going on .. to analyze if you will. I then had a 60 min session with a psychologist and he helped open my eyes to other things I am/was doing and how to change. I am not going to try to change her mind in any way except I am going to try to be someone my wife trusts. Someone who does what he says .. someone who doesnt need mothering and most of all someone she wants to be with. The absence thing is really something that might need to happen … I just have not been strong enough to do it! Yep me not her. I am actually going nuts because she is refusing to show any affection .. claims she has a defensive shield up to protect her from being hurt again. Cant say as I blame her but …. oh well its all abut me isnt it .. LOL

Thank you to all of you who have commented and given your 2 cents worth. I need to hear experience …….

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[Anonymous]

I am sorry for posting something unrelated … but your help is needed

I am doing a research paper on attention deficit disorder (ADD). The core purpose of this research paper is to present information and data from a whole different perspective: a positive one. This research paper is dedicated to those who have ADD and are constantly being put down by researches that focus primarily on what they lack rather than what they have.

If you have attention deficit disorder (ADD), kindly fill out the survey

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/YPGLKJJ

Sincerely,

D.S.

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[Author]

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