March 4, 2011 at 4:18 pm #91808
AnonymousInactiveMarch 4, 2011 at 4:18 pmPost count: 14413
i’m starting on some of these already Distracted66, have my iphone set for some reminders. Also trying a thing my upcoming coach recommended, setting a 20 minute timer for certain tasks with the goal being to work “completely” for the “whole” 20 min period. I failed 1st two tries… have had some successes now : }
Keep it coming…thanks.REPORT ABUSEMarch 4, 2011 at 10:10 pm #91810
AnonymousInactiveMarch 4, 2011 at 10:10 pmPost count: 14413
I have tried to set aside specific times for certain jobs but over the years the inflexibility of that system became a huge problem. I assume that if for some reason you cannot do what you’re supposed to do at 2 PM, that you do that task ASAP thereafter. I, sadly, just get stuck and I am liable to stay stuck for a really long time.
So, I have found a bit more success with the suggestion that Rick made a month ago. I do not have a TO DO list. I have TO DO notes. That way I can sort them by priority. Regular recurring tasks are in a set by themselves. But ONE job that is not a regular recurring job is selected for each day and that gets priority. That doesn’t always mean that it gets done first, but it gets done before the end of the day.
My problem (yeah, right, I only have one! LOL) is that the regular recurring tasks start to slip and then stuff piles up. I quite simply cannot do all that I feel I should do. Maybe I expect too much from myself. But at least the really important stuff does get some attention and at the end of the day I can look back and say – “That’s done!”
I will add that years ago I started keeping track of how long I worked on something, and making estimates about how long something should take, etc. That was a real help. It was also helpful to stop when my estimated time was up.REPORT ABUSEMarch 5, 2011 at 2:49 am #91811
BAM123ParticipantMarch 5, 2011 at 2:49 amPost count: 71
One of the ebst peices of advice fo ADD I recievd was from a video with Dr. J. He said get bucket and unload your pockets wehn youi get home every night – car keys, glasses , phone wallet. It sounds so easy and simple it is.
I found thye same life altering results from the scanner.
See Post below I posted in Tools forum – at the risk of sounding self centered I’m amazed that there have been no responses. I am amn orgfanizational mess and the scanner I bought top organize and store paper and files has been absolutley amazing in terms of cconquering my paper paralyssis and re- organization.
ALso making files on M S outlool to drop and drag and store info has been very helpful.
“I bought a high speed scanner and it totally revoltionalized my brain and how I do things. I am in a very paper intensive line of work and have a very non linear brain. Not to mention the kids, records, schedules, taxes etc.
Now every scrap of paper i have gets scanned in, filed in an electronic filing cabinet – Example: Cabinet “Personal” – the files “Electric Bill” etc…. same for business. It really is amazing and what is liberating is after I am done scanning the paper I look at it and I know I don’t need it anymore so I SHRED IT and back it up.
My universe is at my finger tips. Before I was a total organizational mess and now – my office, my files and my life have become far more managable, productive, effecient, profitable and hopeful. If you have a hard time organizing things, keeping track an following up – check it out. Scan it, drag and drop it and shred it. Oh by the way you can search any document you scan by typing a couple of key words and it pops up automatically.
This is the ADD’ers best friend for organization and overwelm amazing. What will you/I do with all that wasted time the we will recover? “REPORT ABUSEMarch 17, 2011 at 12:59 am #91812
AnonymousInactiveMarch 17, 2011 at 12:59 amPost count: 14413
That is one the most difficult things to learn – flexibility. It is still an issue for me and it will probably always be. Although, I have the scheduled times for performing particular tasks but I also have had to learn to simply let it go or simply postpone the task until I have time, which could be within ten minutes or thirty – regardless, I just accept that I didn’t have time but now I do.
Becoming stuck is a reality but not a life sentence – I once thought it was but have learned that it is a self-imposed issue for me – not saying it is for anyone else.
Sticky notes are truly invaluable; I still use them myself because lists can be daunting since when they grow we ADHDer’s see the ‘big-picture’ from start to finish – very, very overwhelming to say the least. However, when we take the time to break down the list into small manageable pieces we can breathe easier – like the old saying goes, “You can eat an elephant one bite at a time”.
Well, that I suppose that is why my coach has told me that setting at time each day to do a ‘little’ of those tasks that are large and ominous is perhaps the best approach – the elephant idea above. As I mentioned before, I have multi-coloured folders that I put various types of work in. I have three of the most important on top, the ‘follow-up’, the ‘urgent’ and the ‘filing’ folders. Filing is the first task of my day since if allowed to pile up and go unattended, it will soon be overwhelming and would require hours of dedicated and focused attention. Then my follow-up folder is next which I need to action things from past projects or projects which require approval or information from some other party. Once I have dealt with each of these, my urgent folder is places squarely on my desk ready for a maximum of five immediately required projects.
Keeping a log of your time spend on various projects has a purpose in teaching the ADHD brain how to reckon time and conceptualize time periods. This helps us to be better prepared to estimate time for projects and what not – great teaching tool.
Distracted66REPORT ABUSEMarch 23, 2011 at 3:36 am #91813
AnonymousInactiveMarch 23, 2011 at 3:36 amPost count: 14413
I stumbled upon add.com when i started reading The Winner’s Brain . just one of the many books ive purchased to “fix myself”. becoming a member is my first step in “Taking action ” and im really nervious putting myself out there. but if i dont , i know that i will continue to regret that once again ive talked myself out of moving forward because im scared. I dont want to stand still anymore its getting old . i learned, not making a decision …is a choice. a choice not to decide … thats what ive been doing for a long time. thats why i picked the screen name idoeno …. because thats my answer for everything . i dont know . i was told this is the word that describes me best. So today i choose you ! My name is idoeno an i have adhd . oh , i have 1 question to put out there, has anyone gone to a store shop around for a good while, put stuff in your buggy your intending to buy , and walk out with nothing?REPORT ABUSEMarch 23, 2011 at 4:17 am #91814
Lindstr7MemberMarch 23, 2011 at 4:17 amPost count: 103
Can someone tell me how to start a new topic on this site? Thanks.
Idoeno, I’m glad you found this site….just found it myself about a week ago and its given me great insight and I don’t feel so alone and disconnected. There are some senior members here that can give you good advice. So, first off, congratulate yourself on getting this far. It was a choice you made to get the book and visit this site so you can check those off your list! See you can make decisions. I’m curious if you have or are planning to be evaluated. I made three appointments and cancelled them before I finally made it today. And I’ll tell you, making the decision to go, and actually going, was one of the best “choices” i’ve made in my life.
I just started taking a small dose of Ritalin today and am hoping it will help me “fix myself” as well. I’ve been beating myself up for years for not feeling “normal.” When I went to my doctor today I told her “I just want to be normal.” She told me there is no “normal.” Everyone is unique (sorry if this is sounding sappy), and there is no other one in the world like you. As far as “I doe no” goes” it sounds like you need to get in touch with what you want and not focus on what other people are doing or how accomplished they are or that you’re not where they are in your life. I hope you’re not thinking “spare me the platitudes,” but I really do try to live like that now, if I don’t I just spin my wheels worrying. Indecision can be paralyzing, I know.
Typically, when I go shopping I get so distracted by all the pretty groceries that I end up leaving without what I went in for…garg.
I’m big on making notes to myself on my blackberry now.
It sounds like you’ve already made a pretty major by deciding you want a better life for yourself and that is a great choice. Whats your next move?REPORT ABUSEMarch 23, 2011 at 12:01 pm #91815
AnonymousInactiveMarch 23, 2011 at 12:01 pmPost count: 14413
I’m undiagnosed, but my husband has ADHD and we’re sure I do too (scored 8/9 on both parts of the test here). This week I started taking my husband’s Ritalin and it’s helping a lot. My doc is on holiday but next Monday I am going to call and book an appointment to see her. I’ve talked about my symptoms with my psychologist and he’s going to write a letter to her as well. So I am definitely not in control of my ADHD but here’s what’s been happening organizationally.
I have to make lists or I stay awake at night thinking about stuff I have to/want to do. I’ve read David Allen’s book and it was useful to a point, but my problem is that I am continuously thinking of great things to do or that will improve my business (I’m a self-employed entrepeneur) and adding on to my lists. Lists are a crucial thing to me and I can’t just put only one thing on a list, that would drive me around the bend (I’m halfway there already).
I use the task list in gmail for some things, it’s useful for dating tasks, but if I want to segment tasks, then the online http://www.todoist.com is more useful. The trouble is, the lists and projects grow and grow! I haven’t used todoist in awhile, should probably get back to it but I’d need to purge everything and start over as it’s overwhelming.
I can get extremely off-track just organizing and never acting on the organization. It’s like searching out and buying the right book, admiring the cover, even admiring the layout inside, but never getting down and reading it from cover to cover. Actually, on the topic of books, I am a book junkie and have banned myself from bookstores as I have a huge stackful of books (never mind the ones in the bookshelf) that I bought and really want to read, but can never find the time to read. I’m reading ADHD and its effects on marriage right now, and that’s the one that is spurring me forward right now to try to get this resolved and under control since symptoms have definitely worsened in the recent past, particularly inattentiveness.
I agree with the poster who says that there is an adrenal rush in checking off things, the downside is that I do low priority things in order to feel grounded and then get the rush of checking them off. I like to spend time reading headlines on the internet first thing in the morning (I work from home) and get distracted. Sometimes I clean house. I cut my nails. I check my email constantly (no smartphone). I bug my husband to do something other than sleeping or hanging out on the computer. I look out the window. I organize my piles of books and papers. I make a cup of tea, drink it, make another. I remember that really great idea I had and decide to “just spend a few minutes researching it on the internet” but end up working on a project that in the end I abandon – “what was I thinking, it won’t work”. So that combination of activities means that my business day starts after lunch, and sometimes it starts even later (yesterday I only really got down to “productive” work around 7 pm). And I usually feel that I wasted most of the day (I did) and next day becomes even more of a scramble to get things done.
I also have problems with sitting on BIG orders until I feel like producing them, and then I have to really work hard (hyperfocus) to get them done in time. I can’t seem to get ahead because I don’t like doing routine production work. I guess I’m addicted to the rush of getting a lot of orders and then focusing on them to the exclusion of all else.
I liked one list-making idea that I read somewhere, you divide the list up into three columns, one column is called BITES, the next GOBBLES, and the third MUNCHERS. In other words, things that take less than 15 min to do, things that take hours to do, and things that take days or weeks or months to do. It helped me get through things by identifying some of the things I could do quickly to get them off the list. The only problem was the list was neverending.
Since I work from home and work/homelife are completely intertwined and inseperable, my latest list has three columns, one for each of my two businesses and a third for home. I’ve only written down the things that I need to do in the next few days, and I’ve circled in red the really important things that HAVE to get done.
I struggle, it’s hard to get started, I know what I should be working on, but all of these other tasks and distractions are hard to resist.
Does anyone else have this problem?REPORT ABUSEMarch 23, 2011 at 12:06 pm #91816
AnonymousInactiveMarch 23, 2011 at 12:06 pmPost count: 14413
thanks lindstr7 for responding. is there a topic you are interested in talking about? i barely no how to navagate around web sites, im too impatient and usually dont understand directions , surprise !! i realized , im real good at getting people to do things for me because its so easy for them to do and cant understand why “i just dont get it “. once i opened my eyes to the possibility i might b alone someday and that there is so many day to day task i dont do on my own , scared me. ive always had a boyfriend and there was always someone around willing to help out. ive never really relied on myself. ive ended relationships to try to force myself to b independant and someone would always b right there to take there place. i love the relationship im in and i almost ruined it because i thought i could fix myself without medication. i really didnt want to go to a therapist , i thought it meant i was weak. but i new i could not b in any relationship if i dont address the issue. my next move is to step out of my comfort zone and respond and post my feelings on here without asking anyone ” SHOULD I , WHAT DO U THINK,” and if i say something stupid, misspell, use the wrong word ,say to much say to little , put the comma in the wrong spot, WHO CARES its not a big deal and at least i tried. Lindstr7, i can relate to your story. (being normal and all the pretty things that distracted u from the thing u were supposed to buy) is ritalin the first med. youve ever tried? and did your Dr. dicuss with you that they think you have add. or just write you out a persription? one more ?, before you new u had add. did u think you or they think u were just depressed?REPORT ABUSEMarch 23, 2011 at 12:17 pm #91817
AnonymousInactiveMarch 23, 2011 at 12:17 pmPost count: 14413
idoeno, yes, I have spent a lot of time in a store (very distracted, feel I need to look at everything before I leave in case I miss seeing something) and put something in my cart that I think I really, really need to have. I wander around thinking about it and eventually take it out because I know that in the past, I’ve gotten home with it and thought “why did I buy that, I really don’t need it”.
I tend not to go shopping anymore. My husband and I are both vegetarians, so that makes it a bit easier grocery shopping as we can avoid most of the store.REPORT ABUSEMarch 23, 2011 at 5:00 pm #91818
Lindstr7MemberMarch 23, 2011 at 5:00 pmPost count: 103
Good for you for having the wisdom and courage to just do it and not ask anyone “should I”? Again, its taking small steps towards making change that is the most effective and lasting. Plant that first foot on the ground, then the second foot. EVERYONE makes mistakes., you probably are hyper-sensitive to your own.
I have to say, your story sounds very similar to mine in that I always had people do things for me: Siblings (I was the youngest), friends, boyfriends, husband. It worked until, well my husband got tired of it and asked for a divorce. I was paralyzed and freaked out, cried every day, raged at him and others, thought of suicide (but I could never leave my child motherless since I grew up without a mother). Then, I was forced out into the big scary world on my own (although I’m still getting support from him and not quite functional enough to get out and get a job, although if I were forced to I would have to go out and deal with my dysfunction in the “real world” yikes!) So, I think that your getting a handle on things now while you are in a supportive relationship will help you prepare for if/when you find yourself on your own. I think the uncertainty of “what might happen” can be paralyzing too (well, for me I KNOW it is). I understand why you are afraid, any change can be frightening, but you are making steps to make yourself into the person you know you WANT to be. I am too. I found that I can’t always keep comparing myself to where others are and beat myself up for having wasted so many years of my life doing NOTHING productive and just spinning my wheels. For years I hid in my house, smoked pot, hid from friends, made excuses, ducked n’ dived. Well, the pot I realized was only making me fat and unmotivated and I thought to myself, I’ve got to do this for me aAND most especially my child.
So, long story longer (sorry), I finally did go to the doctor yesterday and got a 30 day prescription for ritalin. Today will be the first day taking the full dosage, so I won’t know if its helping for a few days probably. I don’t know where you live (I live in US, WA state) and I have decent health insurance. I told my doc I wanted to discuss ADD. Listen, your doctor knows (or should know) about this condition as more and more people are discovering they have it and pharmaceutical companies are climbing over each other to get the latest med on the market….why?….because its a product in great demand. You are most definitely NOT alone in this. I want to encourage you to make an appointment and keep it. Think ahead about what you want to ask and say and write it down. They will likely ask you a series of questions or give you a survey to fill out and take it from there. My next step is to be evaluated in their “Behavioral Health” dept. to be evaluated. If you have insurance, I would get thee to the telephone and make that appointment. If you write things down ahead of time before you go, you can always refer to your “cheat sheet”. Be brave and strong and you’ll be so proud of yourself for taking such a big step. Then, instead of “Idoeno” you’ll be “I did it”! Finally, yes, I thought I was depressed and am on Celexa for that but now I’m not so sure I’m depressed or maybe I’m depressed because my ADD made me dysfunctional. They will try to determine of you are depressed or if you have ADD or both as they, according to my doctor, can sometimes overlap. Try not to think of yourself as “separate” from everyone else. Like my doctor said, “there is no normal.” Sorry to go on so long and please stay in touch here, people have been great.REPORT ABUSEMarch 24, 2011 at 1:20 pm #91819
AnonymousInactiveMarch 24, 2011 at 1:20 pmPost count: 14413
no-dop, i had a good laugh when i read that. countless hours i spent on that same routine. My boyfriend would say, ” i t doesnt bother me how long you shop or even the cost ,but for all that time you spent and not got nothing ??? He wont shop with me anymore EVEN when i say … no , really , i now exacally what i need and ill b real quick. his response …. no thanks ill pass.REPORT ABUSEMarch 24, 2011 at 8:17 pm #91820
AnonymousInactiveMarch 24, 2011 at 8:17 pmPost count: 14413
Now that I’m doing a trial of meds, we went shopping today (office supplies) and for the first time in as long as I can remember, I actually bought some stuff without walking all over the store and then putting it back, or without doing the inner dialogue “which one should I get?” that loops over and over. It felt like a big accomplishment! I had a list of what I needed, and I worked the list.
I also made an excel file of my IMPORTANT TO DO LIST so that I don’t have to waste time writing it down on little scraps of paper each day. Helps with that feeling I get of a moth buzzing against a bright light.
The other big thing that has improved with the trial of meds is that I can walk downstairs to get something and actually remember what it was I wanted to get. Not as much exercise going up and down stairs but a heckuva lot less frustrating!REPORT ABUSEMarch 27, 2011 at 7:08 pm #91821
AnonymousInactiveMarch 27, 2011 at 7:08 pmPost count: 14413
Linstr7- what a scary thing to b faced with.but , you picked yourself back up . thats the important thing. i think the hardest thing is taking that first step. dont get discouraged if ritalin doesnt do what u want it to, dont give up on medicine. i had to try a number of diff. ones before somthing worked to make me take action, and its still on a trial period. keep it up !!!REPORT ABUSEMarch 27, 2011 at 7:13 pm #91822
AnonymousInactiveMarch 27, 2011 at 7:13 pmPost count: 14413
no dopamine, way to go ! i cant wait for shopping to b enjoyable . what are you taking ?REPORT ABUSEMarch 30, 2011 at 4:39 am #91823
powcatMemberMarch 30, 2011 at 4:39 amPost count: 61
Ok, I stopped reading halfway through, so I don’t forget what I wanted to say.
Good tips, RICK and BILL!
ALEX, I also found that site way too overwhelming.
Scheduling my time really freaks me out; I work with a wall calendar, a pocket agenda, and an ongoing to-do list that’s broken down into sections on my computer. When I went to a Disabilities Counsellor at my university, as per my therapist’s advice, I told her all this. She still roped me into creating a schedule, with all the hours mapped out and everything. It was based on my existing habits and there were lots of breaks scheduled in but I still can’t handle it; just looking at it freaks me out.
Anybody else experience this? Gonna keep plugging away but stress is high as I’ve got several projects to do and the semester ends in two weeks exactly…REPORT ABUSE
Organization and Time Management HELP!2010-01-06T03:42:03+00:00
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