Update on my progress…

[ashockley55]

So, because it would cost me a lot of money to find and pay for a doctor outside of my PPO, and because the only other psychiatrist listed in my PPO’s directory will be out of the country until May, I decided to give the people at the office I saw a few weeks back another chance.

I was scheduled to meet with a therapist. I was planning on giving her the self-assessment questionnaire I had been given by the nurse the last time I was there, and ask that she help me make an appointment to be assessed by a doctor or someone who could prescribe proper treatment if the assessment verified ADD.

Two hours before the appointment, the office called and told me that I couldn’t see the therapist because my insurance didn’t allow it. They offered to let me see their licensed social worker. I agreed.

Yesterday, I showed up for my appointment. This time, I had to pay $50. Two visits, and I am in the hole $90. She took me to an office, sat down with me, and with a notebook and files in her lap, after briefly introducing herself, she announced that she had not read my file yet.

I should have gotten up and left that very moment.

She continued to inform me that she would be asking me some questions. She stated that it may be redundant, then she backed up and said, “Well, not redundant…”

but that was exactly what it was.

Essentially, I ended up paying an additional $50 dollars to have the same, basic intake assessment performed as I did with the nurse the first time I went to this place.

The only response she had to my concerns about ADD was, “You seem calm.”

(What she couldn’t see was the inner struggle it was taking for me to remain seated, to not look around the room at stuff while she was talking, to not interrupt her, to not talk and talk and talk. I didn’t feel inclined to reveal this to her, because, if she’s too ignorant of the problem to realize that ADD isn’t always in-your-face bouncing off the walls, then…well, honestly, I was already checked out at “I haven’t read your file yet…” I already felt defeated, and knew the appointment was going to be a waste.)

At the end, she asked me how often I wanted to meet. I wanted to laugh. Instead I said, “At $50 a pop? Not very often.” She said, “Well, it will go slow, then.” And I thought, “You mean, slower than this? Slower than spinning my wheels with you people like I have for the past 45 minutes with you?” But I let her make the appointment with no intention of keeping it.

So, what do I do now? I want to call the insurance company and complain, but where will that get me? There are only two options – this place, or the other psychiatrist who is out of the country until May. Do I pay out of pocket to see someone else, someone I research and find on my own? Who?

I really wish I had the guts to call that place up, voice my complaints about my experience thus far, and ask – no, demand – my money back.

Do you think that would be appropriate?

I keep coming up with all kinds of excuses, like maybe even if she had looked at my file she would’ve had to ask the same questions just to get my answers for herself.

But, I just didn’t gel with her dismissive attitude. At one point, after I thought I had made it clear that I wasn’t happy working as a waitress, she brushed it off with “Oh, I waited tables to get through college. It’s okay.”

I was VERY proud of myself because I actually stopped her and said, “No. It’s not okay. I’m not okay with it. This isn’t just a part time job while I get through school. This is me in a low-level job after having failed at two previous attempts to have a professional career. This is me not living up to my talents and abilities.”

I just didn’t feel heard at all. She didn’t make ANY mention of persuing any kind of formal assessment for ADD. I think they hear “bipolar disorder” (because I answer their questions about prior diagnoses honestly, I don’t want to lie) and that slams and locks the door on anything else I have to say. She did ask me if I felt like I had been misdiagnosed, and I answered affirmatively to that question, but she didn’t make any further comments about helping me get a proper diagnosis.

This struggle is so frustrating, and I’m just not sure what to do next. Part of me feels like giving up on getting the assessment and treatment, but I know that’s not what I want to do. It’s just so ironic – assessment and treatment, once you have a direction to go, should be just about the simplest thing in the world. It should be as simple as making an appointment. But I get detoured by some nurse and her agenda and her paperwork and her series of questions that somehow lead down this road away from my objective.

Monthly meetings at $50 a pop with a licensed social worker was not my goal.

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[kc5jck]

Those people are idiots, I wouldn’t go back. I would write them a letter. Let them know you were charged twice for the same intake assessment and let them know you are giving them the opportunity to correct the problem before you write the BBB as well as notifying the professional, state, and federal agencies that license and oversee their practices. Let the know that whatever your problem is, it is not going to allow them to take advantage of you or keep you from getting really pissed over their incompetance and the treatment or lack thereof by their office.

If they want you to draw pictures, I have some suggestions for that as well.

In an effort to find someone who could help, you might check with a public school nurse to see if she knows of any good professionals that could evaluate you. She may know of one through some of the students.

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[ashockley55]

“If they want you to draw pictures, I have some suggestions for that as well.”

That is awesome! Thank you for making me smile.

And the public school nurse! Yes! Thank you!!

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